Share your quitting journey
What a differance 12 hours make as I was writing about the Freedom train I must have let my guard down, as I got up this afternoon to get ready for work I was attacked big time, I remember reading a blog awhile back as someone called in the calvary and circled the wagons to fight of the attack of the Nicodemon and all I could think to do was retreat and run like hell eating did no good, drinking water did no good so I took a good long hot shower and as I got out it was all I could do to keep the Nicodemon at bay, I finally went to the garage and thank GOD that I threw out any cig's I had kept there I then went to the ashtray which was empty thank goodness or otherwise I might have tried to light a butt that was three weeks old. I read an articale that I keep posted in my old smoking spot on reasons why I don't want to smoke anymore the attack subsided after that but only for a short time and I found myself retreating again and I was in a full run this time I don't know why I didn't get on-line and ask for help but i didn't and I was slipping fast so i went to the store as fate would have it my daughter was working and I had always refused to buy smokes when she working as I have never wanted my kids to start smoking anyway dumby me gets some coffee and the cravings got so strong that I thought I would explode if i didn't have a cigarette I head to another gas station to get some smokes and it was as if the EX-community was there protecting me there were a few guys out smoking and the smell of them almost made me gag and I mean that literally I thought I was going to get sick right there as I got really dizzy and had to retreat to my truck and get some fresh air as I was calming down I wanted to scream as I almost made a big mistake and let myself down once again on my resolve to quit smoking forever. I am still trying to figure out what the trigger was that got me to that point and I mean before the coffee I honestly don't know what happened or how it started but it sure was overwhelming and as I sat in my truck waiting for the attack to end it struck me that I need to attack back and beat this urge so I drove to work and here I am asking for help
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