Good morning , or good evening . Thought I posted this journal this morning , but not .
As I sit here with a glass of OJ looking outside the sun is shining . It's glistening and the birds are happy and chirping . After a snowy rain filled day a couple days ago I see green in the otherwise dull grey grass . I knew there was life under there somewhere lol . Patience is hard.
Is spring really here ? Well here where I live , and a few other on Ex , you just never know but I'll take today as a sign of hope and envelope it because it's beautiful and I will send it to any of you in the dumps today or tonight and hopefully it will cheer you just a little too .
I have been under a cloud of bad weather myself recently. I am on day six /seven with Covid but thanks to an early testing and the anti viral medication a mild case . Stil , don't underestimate covid . Mild is different for everyone there are just so many factors . A couple days weren't too good but I had a glimpse of sunlight yesterday ; you know , the ah ha moment, the illusion where I thought "well I handled this pretty easily , then a black cloud settled in once again with even stronger symptoms . I can only be grateful for them because they showed me how precious our lungs are and that quitting smoking was the best thing I ever could have done . The very first day I knew I had covid was chest pain . I'm still trying to get the mucous out of my lungs .
Yes I caught covid , vaccinations , faithfully masked. All the precautions but maybe once ? Was there that one time I thought like an addict that just one time would be ok not to wear a mask ?
I'll get better , but many won't . I get another chance , again . Are you in your second , third chance quitting smoking ? Maybe it's the tenth try . It's your opportunity to quit . You were given another chance .
Please stop smoking . It's not worth it . No situation , or crisis or fall out with someone is worth putting that cigarette to your lips . It's contagious infectious , relentless poison .
I'm no expert ok , these are just thoughts of an old addict writing her journal .
There is never a gaurenteed immunity to Covid , to cancer , to the flu or to picking up a cigarette . We can never be too confident that our quits are solid or that we are safe . We should never boast of our quits , but be grateful and content where we are . Live every second , every minute , every hour of every day smoke free . We should never think that we are excempt of a crisis , illness or temptation that's too overwhelming to hold on . Addiction doesn't care what you think . It doesn't care if your hurting or happy . It doesn't care if you are stubborn or weak .
So , one day at a time .. live it ! Accept all that comes with it , change what you can , but don't let a crave let this day make you miserable all day . Acknowledge it , then blow it away like chaff . You are are doing the right thing quitting and you can do this !
If you are able and it is warm and clear tonight take a walk and look at the stars . Each one of us quit or quitting is a star and there are many more looking over us cheering us on . Don't give in . Reach out to other stars .
No idea where I was going with this post .. I hope however something was helpful to someone .
