It's been 38 hours since my last cigarette. This is the farthest I've gotten without cheating in years. I'm using the patch, and it's definitely helping with the withdrawal symptoms as I work on changing my habits. I quit off and on throughout the last year, but as a single parent in grad school, I gave myself nothing but excuses for why it just wasn't "the right time." Funnily enough, my eating and exercise habits have been super healthy for years. This is the one crutch I've held onto, despite losing many people to cancer. It's time to cut the crap.
Last night was a challenge. I basically worked out, gave myself a facial (you can buy facial masks in single packs for about a dollar at the grocery store), ate a ginormous fruit salad, did yoga, and watched a favorite tv show--all to avoid smoking. I also took an hour-long nap after work, which I never do, because I felt so sluggish and foggy. Today was a challenge--first thing this morning, I faced a challenge that required major problem-solving skills and was extremely stressed out..and I cried. It wasn't even that big a deal, I think it was just that severely addicted part of my brain that was crying out for a crutch to lean on because I was convinced at one time that smoking actually helped relieve stress. I talked myself down, took a walk outside, chose to face the situation with a can-do attitude----and solved the problem in 2 minutes. I've also broken my lunch up into shorter increments so that I can get onto this site periodically and just read, then go out and take a walk.
The primary thought that has kept me going right now is: I've done it. I've actually made it this far. And I just can't throw that away. So, here goes....
