Advice

[Green1516]

Hi there I was just wondering if anyone else is going through the same thing. I'm trying to quick smoking cigarettes, but I live with my boyfriend who also smokes. He's not ready to quit yet, which doesn't bother me, except that it makes it harder for me to quit. Does anyone have any advice or suggestions? Please and thank you all so much for your support!

[NINERS49]

• @Green1516 
  That’s a tough one. I guess you have to be strong and have willpower if you live with a smoker.
• you can do it!! Hubby does chew and although it’s not cigarettes, he’s still using nicotine. Wish i could get him to quit, but he’s got to want it. 
  you’ll be ok, u got plenty of support here. Try different strategies, keep busy. I’m only 3 weeks smoke free cold turkey, but i move forward, even in the days i struggle physically. U got this! 

[RikkiJean]

That is a tough one. 

Ideally, he needs to care that you want to quit and be on your team.  Cheer you on.  Tell you YOU CAN DO THIS.  He shouldn't knowingly do things that will tempt you.  Not sure how to get him on board with that. And we can't control other people's behavior. 

But ultimately, it is your choice to cave when the temptation is there.  You make the decision to fight through the craving or give in.  You're going to have to be extra tough.  There may already be some good tips on the forum here for quitting when someone in the house smokes.  There's so much other good info on here, I'm sure someone has already gone through what you're going through and has written about it.  

Bottom line, if you want it, you can do it.  

[RikkiJean]

@tracy0924 Any advice here?  Your roommate smokes and you're doing AMAZING with your quit.

@Green1516 I just did a quick search for you and I can't find anything. UGH.  There may be info out there, but I'm just not doing the search correctly. 

[tracy0924 · Accepted solution]

Hi @Green1516 and thanks @RikkiJean for reaching out! Sorry it took so long to reply I just haven’t had a chance to get online today. Yes I’m dealing with the same kind of situation. My roommate/good friend is still smoking, although he has quit a few times and wants to again (hopefully for good) sometime in the near future. But it’s been hard because he occasionally leaves cigarette butts in the ashtray on our patio and we have a bucket where the butts go until they head for the trash bin on Wednesdays. The stink is horrible and I hate it! The partial cigarettes sitting in the ashtray are totally unacceptable to me (and this is my home) so I have told him so, and he’s been really good about trying not to leave butts out there that have anything left to smoke. The few times he did in the beginning I reminded him and he got them out of there right away. Thank God for willpower! The first three or four weeks he was really good about not smoking in front of me. Since then I have gotten a little more lax. I really have no desire to smoke 99% of the time, and he supports me so I know that if I ask him for a cigarette he will not give it to me. We had that discussion and I made sure that he understood exactly where I was coming from: that I would not smoke again and that he was not to give me a cigarette whether I begged, pleaded or what have you! It is absolutely out of the question. Make sure that your husband understands that you do not want to smoke and that you do not want him to contribute to you starting again! As for the bucket on the porch, it now gets emptied about four times a week, by me so I don’t have to smell it! 
You just have to spell it out to your husband that you are quitting and that you do not want to smoke again. He is not to smoke in front of you during the beginning of your quit until you feel it is safe (whether it is three weeks or three months or three years!), and that he is not to give you a cigarette NMW, No Matter What! If you are going to break your quit, you need to do it yourself by having to go to a store and buy your own cigarettes. You do not want to have to blame your husband for breaking your quit! I am betting that he will support you 100%! You say that he is not ready to quit yet, which shows that he is thinking about it sometime in the future. That is fantastic! Maybe you can set the example and he can follow in your footsteps. Show him that it is achievable and he might soon be a WINNER with you!

But bottom line, it is going to come down to you, your strength and your willpower! When there is another smoker in the household it makes it more difficult, but it is definitely doable! I’m at 43 days tonight and my smoker roommate has actually been the least of my problems as far as bumps in the road with this quitting journey. I know you can do it! Please reach out if I can help you in any way! Good luck!🤗🤗💕

[Green1516]

These were amazing!! It helped me very much. So thank you to everyone!! Good luck to all of you as well!! 

[lighthousekeep]

Ask your boyfriend to not only stop smoking in front of you, but also ask him to take ALL his smoking OUTSIDE: downwind, 50 feet away from any doors or windows.

Also inform him that any and all cigarettes left in plain sight will be flushed down the toilet!!

Second hand Smoke kills, too!!!

You are building your Quit; you need all the support you can get!!!!

If he refuses to abide by your rules, time to break up and find someone who will support you in your life!!!

No sense designating a smoking room.  Would be like designating a peeing section in a swimming pool!! 

Do whatever you need to do to get yourself FREE of smoke and smoking!!!!!

Yes YOU can!!!

[tracy0924]

@Green1516 sorry I meant boyfriend! I don’t know where I got husband from! LOL!🤗🤗

[tracy0924]

@lighthousekeep I like your strong attitude! I probably need to get even tougher on my roommate. I own the home and should just declare it a non-smoking zone! I wasn’t thinking of the second hand smoke. Good post!💪🏼😊

[lighthousekeep]

Absolutely support your taking a tough stance in your Quit!!

(I have no time for anyone who doesn't support you!!!!)

Hang some NO SMOKING signs around your place!!!

Any one caught breaking the Rule, immediate eviction!!!!!

🙂

Welcome to your Quit!!!!!!!

You're going to LOVE being FREE!!!!!!!!