Well I haven't logged in or blogged in a week or so...I have been tending to my ex...the father of my children... while he finally lost his long, hard fought battle with lung cancer. How baffling it is to be watching someone you love in such pain and agoney...and be so stessed all you want to do is SMOKE! With only 30 days smoke free under my belt and watching my kids so heartbroken I was not prepared for what my mind was telling me..."just smoke a ciggarette and calm down..." OMG! REALLY? Was I insane?!? Fought my way through...have 35 days but be aware...at your lowest...the thought will still attack!