So today I was only smoking on an e cig and I haven't had a real cig all day until about an hr ago. I am dealing with some family issues and I am disappointed for giving in and i know that even though I will have bad times and stess that I have to find better ways to get through it. I know that I have to quit all together because I have two beautiful children that love me very much and need me and I cant do this to them. I was in the hospital last week with the right side of my body going numb face and tongue and all and I overheard the nurse say we have a possible stroke patient and it was the scariest hardest moment I have ever faced in my life. I was rushed with emotions feeling like I am the worst mom ever for not giving it up a long time ago when I have been having signs of strokes for 5 1/2 years now and been in the hospital over 10 times for it. I am proud of myself that I was able to go from a pack and a half to just 2 today so quickly and everytime I want to smoke I look at my kids and use them for motivation and I truly believe if I didnt have them I probably wouldnt be trying to quit right now. I have so many emotions right now one moment im happy and the next I want to cry because its so hard.