Just say no

[Alice23]

Every once in awhile the blogs that jump out to me , are the ones about relapse.

God knows I know how that feels, I am the Queen of the Relapse.  Or should I say I WAS!?

The thing is - I remember those relapses and I feel the emotion every time I read about someone's relapse.

Oh I would be so  mad at myself.  I would say such mean things to myself.  "You are a loser"  "You will never be able to do this"  "You are SO weak"..........I couldn't find a reason to fight for myself - rather I would just beat myself up something fierce!

Until THIS time rolled around.  I am NOT a loser.  I am worth fighting for - and I have been in this fight for 171 days!

What I know I NEVER have to feel again - is the regret of lighting that first cigarette.

I will NEVER regret the one I NEVER light!

N.O.P.E.  - there are a MILLION EXCUSES to smoke - not one good REASON!

*hugs*

Alice

[BobbyMaynard]

Well said Alice and congratulations to you and yes you are worth fighting for. Learning the lesson of self love and self respect may be as important as the not smoking.

[Sootie]

Oh---I hear you Alice---or, sometimes worse----when I would relapse I would begin the justifications...

"oh, well, I feel fine...why worry"

"oh, we all have to die of something"

"oh, this is the only thing I actually do that is unhealthy----I'm allowed one thing right?

MAN----I hate thinking about the years I wasted letting myself off the relapse hook.

[owlfeather]

I haven't seen anyone use this in a while, a lot of people used to use it, and Alice, I think you and for certain me,  can bring this back, because it sits pretty deep with us.   N.E.F.  (Never Ever Forget).   

N.O.P.E. 

N.E.F. 

[lisa236]

I think thats what I need most.  If I could love myself a liitle more I counld kick this thing for good.  Does this sound like an excuse?

[froguelady]

Know the relapse feeling well, did it on and off for 7 years before this final quit.  Once i relapsed I would hate myself for a week or so then forget the guilt for awhile.  It finally dawned on me the person defeating me was myself.  I was the one that didn't say NOPE.  I also like N.E.F.  Alice, you are doing great and your blogs inspire. HUGS

[owlfeather]

CONGRATULATIONS ON 171 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Alice23]

They are all excuses.

There are times I want to romanticize smoking.  I want to "want" to smoke again.  I allow myself to daydream about it - to 'miss' it.  Then I remember looking myself in the eye after a relapse and feeling like C.R.A.P.!

I am CRAZY about myself now and it is the success that has made me stronger as each day goes by!

I am doing this and like I told you in the message I left you ...........I AM DRAGGING YOU WITH ME!  November 1 it is 🙂

On Nov 2 I will be celebrating 6 months smoke free - 

*hugs*

Alice

[owlfeather]

Alice you're just plain awesome that's all there is to it.  Pleasure to know you. 

[Alice23]

Thanks Owlfeather -  right back atcha!

This is the greatest I've EVER felt about myself.  Even when things were going GREAT in life - i always had that nagging addiction dragging me down.  

This site is soooo awesome isn't it !?  We can get through this and journey through this together!

[dbaker]

So true Alice!  6 months is a grand achievement!