Read a member curated list of EX Community content over 10+ years
We always say on the site to read the info the site has to offer and other links we give you. Reading the blogs of our members gives you knowledge of their experiences. Learning about our addiction, the triggers and how to react in certain situations is equipping us for our journey. You will go through NML
( No Mans Land) days 30-130 of your quit where your emotions run high. It's at this point in your quit, if you haven't educated yourself with the info, you could lose your quit. In all my previous quits, I never knew much about my addiction and they ended up as failures. This time I did it the right way and am still quit to this day. Be smart this time!
If you lack faith in your quit, you tend to worry, have anxiety and become more controlled by your circumstances because we aren't confident in the outcome. We need to believe in ourselves that we can do this!
3. COURAGE
It is the mental or moral state to face fear, difficulty and to keep moving on. For example, the initial phase of our quit, where we decide to set that date and start is the easy part. But as days go on, we get a higher resistance from our body and mind. The challenge is to get through this part of the phase. The resistance will increase but we must continue and never give up. At some point the resistance will get weaker and the going will be easier. Through this process, we become stronger.
4. USING WISDOM
The ability to discern or judge what is true, right, or lasting. If you know or have those feelings that something just isn't right or you have a fear something is going to happen that might jeopardize your quit. DON'T DO IT!! For example, if you always drink and smoke together, going to a party isn't a good idea in the beginning unless you are saying no to the alcohol. Even then, you are still in that social setting and you are putting yourself at RISK. Is it worth it?
5. BEING OPTIMISTIC
It ultimately means the best possible outcome of any given situation. We can either lift people up or drag them down. How you react to circumstances affects other people. Everybody has an influence on somebody. To become a more positive person, we must replace every negative thought with a positive one. Examples, I can't do this, I just want to give up = yes I can do this! I will try. I hope I can stop smoking = I will stop smoking. We really need to reprogram our minds. This doesn't just apply in our quits but in our lives. It helps us to become a happier person.
http://media.wix.com/ugd/74fa87_2010cc5496521431188f905b7234a829.pdf
Videos
/blogs/SkyGirl-blog/2013/11/06/dear-friends-family-heres-what-to-expect-from-me-while-i-quit
/blogs/ShawnP-blog/2012/10/20/putting-a-stop-to-smoky-thinking
/blogs/ShawnP-blog/2013/06/24/attention-newbies-read-this-first
Law of Addiction
https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex/blog/2013/12/05/the-two-sets-of-seasons
/blogs/Storm.3.1.14-blog/2014/07/18/the-version-of-us
Quit Kit
Shawn, I would like to re-post this on my blog. I'm adding you to my friends list, so I can get more great truths on quitting. My quit date is December 6, 2013. Just a few days away.
I am preparing, working on changing my thinking, and distancing activities from smokes. I tried mini quits but they didn't work. 😕 Thought I was doing a good thing, but turns out I was causing myself more problems!!!
thanks Shawn for this, my biggest hangup seems to be not believing in myself> I sta in my van for over an hour, not smoking but once my daughter got in I couldn 't help myself. I have work on my preparing to quit. Don't Fell sorry for ME!!! thanks summer
Shawn,
You are amazing, all that you do here for all of us is so appreciated, I really hope that you KNOW that. It is always good to read the support offered to newbies because no matter how long I have been quit...I will always need to remember how easily I could go backwards and how horrible the consequences would be. I am worth more than that, to myself and to others. YOU, my friend, are amazing!
Love,
Ellen
Super post ... I can’t wait to read a lot of the sites you recommend. Thank you for sharing ...
I love how you're doing your homework. You re dedicated to your quit. That's what it takes. You have great accomplishments ahead of you. Keep on.
Wow..downloaded saved..noted...thank you so very much!! This all is so valuable
SO GLAD that you found this...Deelonnsoul you can bookmark the page if you want to be able to access it. Welcome to EX.
Ellen
This is awesome! Thank you so much... love to read !!
Love the information!! I havent reached NML yet I am in the chasms of despair! I deal with something different several times a day...this is hard .... today i was so angry at people driving, i was silently cussing everyone . And I got very angry or frustrated quickly. Next thing you know, I'm crying thinking terrible things.. wow just wow.....But I am making it !! That's why I call it the chasms of despair.. up n down and dont know what's coming around the corner !! Buckle up buttercup!!
You nailed it Shawn.