back after almost 3 years...

[free2be2]

Hi everyone!

Here I am again . It's been almost 3 years free of smoking. My quit date was 08/25/14. 

Being totally confident that I was never going to pick up that cigarette again. I was doing so well.

I started slowly.. having 1 cigarette maybe once a week socially, then 2 or 3 . After a month or so it steadily progressed to the same amount I was smoking before I quit, 10-15 cigs a day.. It's been almost 3 months now that I am back to the habit I don't like. Mad at myself.. I can't believe it I am doing it to myself again. At least now I know where to go and what to do.

Hoping that I can do it again and be smarter next time.. I have hope, but I know it's not going to be easy. 

Grateful for this place with so much support and information, going to dig all info that helped me last time. Picking up the date again.. July 1st really spoke to me, Don't want to prolong this agony .. 

Any advice and support would be greatly appreciated!

Thank you.

[djmurray]

Let me also welcome you back to this wonderful community.  Some of us have quit once, never looked back and stacked it up.  Lots of us have had some failures and found our forever quits right here.  And one of the valuable lessons you can teach us is that there is no "Cure." We're never cured of our addiction.  I speak of the very opportunistic little lady who lives in my brain who occasionally wakes up and tries to convince me I'm cured, and it would do me good to have a smoke.  I just smile and say I know who you are, and I know you're wrong.  She then goes back where she came from.  Now I don't feel deprived by not smoking.  I feel liberated.  Rereading Allen Carr is a really good idea.

I'm glad you're back and have the resources and support of this community to help you get back to where you want to be.

[free2be2]

I appreciate your welcome! I hope to get back soon. A lot of work for me to do, since I forgot a lot of what I learned here. 

[cbgerber]

Hi Free2be2  I too am back and the first article I read was yours.  My quit was only 4 mos++ so I must congratulate you on reaching 3 years.  I like you thought one cigarette would do no harm only quiet my nerves but NO.  I smoked the full pack and went out for one more.  I can offer no excuse but a large mistake was not coming back to the group first.    Two people especially were so helpful and supportive when I first decided to quit (Ellen and Mark) and I know they would have pulled me through this difficult time.  I will not make that mistake again - as someone above mentioned don't leave the group to soon.  I do have a lot going on in my life right now  -  all good but mind boggling.  My new quite date is tomorrow 6/17/17.  I will start my day off as I did back them by getting up and out to the gym before I have time to think.  I have my first cup of coffee at the gym.  I sit for about a half an hour and contemplate my day before exercising.  I wish you well with your new quit and I can tell from the long list of responses that you have many friends to support you - now I am one of them.  I am also glad you are back.  

[elvan]

cbgerber‌  I wrote myself a note last week when I was at work to remind myself to check on you since I had not heard anything.  You know we are here, you know we care, and I KNOW that you know that smoking does not do anything FOR you.  I have to work tomorrow but will check in before I leave and I will check back in when I get home.  I am glad to "see" you here and I am glad that your quit date is tomorrow.

XOXO,

Ellen

[dwwms]

I too have thought about you, Clare. It has been awhile since we conversed. I am so glad you've not given up. Hope this first day is going well & the first of many!

Doug

[cbgerber]

Hi Doug, 

When I saw your name I realized my mistake when I put Mark down - it was you I was thinking of.  My brain was a bit mixed up as it was difficult to write this note.  Sorry!  My first day is going well so far.  Our annual family gathering is at the end of the month and there is quite a bit of work to do.  We now number 25 - including my brother Tom - that will be thirteen adults and twelve grandchildren for the week.  My daughter Mary houses the little ones and some adults the remainder will stay at our home.  This year we have planned for each family to take care of one evening meal plus clean up.  The week flies by with much laughter, singing, tennis, swimming, cooking, movies, parks, etc.  I am always amazed that the day of departure is upon us way to soon.  I think of you and all your outdoor activities - that will be us during the week.  

One of my reasons for quitting was so that I could keep up with everyone without having to stop to catch my breath.  All my children are very athletic  -  2 Ironman, all have run marathons, triathlons, 100 mile biking in the Colorado Rockies and so much more.  So I will not give up - I will make it this time.  I hope all is well with you and that you are enjoying your summer in NC.  Please keep in touch - as I will with you.  Thanks!  Clare

[elvan]

cbgerber  You WILL make it this time, Clare.  You are ready.

[dwwms]

Sounds like a big event coming up and from the sounds of your family, I don't think I could possibly keep up! I agree with Ellen - you WILL make it this time!

[Kathryn16]

You deserve to breath fresh air, all the time. Every minute of every day. If you want to smoke, dont. Just take a deep breath and enjoy the fresh air we were naturally intended to breath. Remember, you deserve it to breath!

[free2be2]

I wish you the best of luck today ! I believe in you! Somehow it's easier to believe in others than myself. I'll stay close by.