Unexpected Temptation

[ReallyReal]

I was in my car looking for something and found an old  vape pen that I had no idea was in there.  Oh, the temptation to take a puff, no idea if there are any puffs left on it.  I did not fall to temptation but I will be honest, I didn't throw the vape pen away either, with the addict thinking I might like to just try a puff on it.  Well, as soon as I finish typing this I am going to my car, getting that thing out of my glove box and tossing it--without taking "just one" puff.  Oh my gosh, the things we do as addicts--ugh.

[biscuit9]

@ReallyReal  Glad you are getting rid of the vape pen.  The addict in you won't be able to let that thing alone.  I even tried to switch from cigs to vaping years ago, but was never successful.  Little story, on day 7 of my quit, I was left alone for the first time, and I found that nasty vape pen and I even took a few drags and it worked!  (I don't even remember the last time I had touched the thing).  Not satisfying or anything, but I did hit it.  That might have been the lowest point of my entire quit and I hated myself in that moment.  I just didn't let that moment define me and I threw the thing away, along with some trash smokes (brands I don't like) I had stashed away for emergencies.  We can never underestimate the power of the nic addiction.  It is ruthless and as an addict, I can't have any of it.  

Stay strong Raissa.  You are working this, one day at a time.

[champsin97]

Good for you girl.  We don't need those things anymore.  I can't even think about having to start over.  Stay strong!

[ReallyReal]

@champsin97 @biscuit9 thanks for your encouragement.  I threw that nasty thing away without using it--my thought was like you mentioned, I can't imagine having to start over again with quitting.  So not worth taking a puff, cause for me, just one puff would land me back at 1 1/2 packs a day in no time.  I want to remain FREE, with money to spare in my wallet and lungs that breathe easy and no stench lingering on my clothes.  Funny how this played out with the unexpected suddenly appearing, but it was a good strengthening exercise and I beat the addicted thinking once again.  I say, Yay for all of us kicking nicotine's butt!! Go Exers!!!

[Barbscloud]

@ReallyReal Glad you resisted the temptation and came to Ex to share your experience.  I suspect  acknowledging on the Ex that you still had that vape, was a motivating factor to discarding it.

Keep moving forward one day at a time.

Barb

[ReallyReal]

@Barbscloud Yes, definitely, Barb, sharing that I had found the vape pen was a great motivator to not use it and to discard it.  There is a saying in recovery circles--You are only as sick as your secrets.  If I had taken a puff in secret it would have led to shame and demoralization, which undoubtedly would have led to active addiction again for me.  I will not go back there, no matter what.  I hope my resolve in the face of finding the vape pen might encourage others to come to Ex with their temptations BEFORE smoking or vaping, and that can help them successfully overcome the urge.

[Barbscloud]

@ReallyReal Totally agree.  I always tell new quitters, come to the Ex before you smoke/vape, not after.  It really works. Doing that activity  saved my quit several times early on.

Be proud of your choices.

Barb