Rant: Didn't You Come Here Asking for Help?

[Thomas3.20.2010]

I'm ticked! It takes a lot for me to get ticked but when I do I explode like a volcano and then I calm down and start thinking reasonable. Hopefully this will happen this time too!

Day after day people come here and ask for answers and support. And day after day the Community of all walks comes here and helps with whatever strength and efforts, answers and knowledge that they have. 

Then there are occasionally those very few who come here, ask for support and then turn around and say, "Who asked you?" 

Well....you did! Or did I miss something? 

If what you really want is for the Community to assure you that you already have the answers about Smoking Cessation and support means that I agree with mistaken concepts that virtually all Nicotine Addicts have about their drug of choice then I can't just say, "Oh Yes! That's a great idea!"

- Hold onto that last pack!

- Hang out with your smoking buddies!

- Keep that smoking patio!

- Go to bars and drink!

I can't do that!

It's not because I'm contrary and against different ways of thinking!

It's because I suffer every moment of every day with a smoking related illness.  It's because I know that nobody wants to die but there are some ways of living that are worse than dying! Dying happens to all of us! 

Because I care about You I don't want you to live the horrible life of an Addict who little by little dwindles away their Quality of Life while they continue to suck on their Sickerettes! 

I get tired. But I come back because I care so much! And I won't smoke over it because smoking never did anything for me - it just robbed me of Quality of everyday Life! Don't let it happen to you!

[Mike.n.Atlanta]

Amen Brother!

If they don't wanna hear what they need to hear they're in the wrong place.

KOKO my friend.

M n @

[Strudel]

As Mike said - amen! 

[NewMe]

I will just add 2 or 3 cents worth here. I think I am running about 2 weeks ahead of Kristen on quit dates, and I say Amen to her sentiments. All of you who were posting pretty regularly when I first quit (Thomas, Elvan, Giulia, Jackie, Terrie, Marilyn, and more) were definitely the glue that held my very hesitant and fearful quit together in the beginning. So many times in the first month, I would contemplate giving up and going to buy a pack. It was the words of the elders rolling around in my head that stopped me. You all made a huge difference in my life. You convinced me I was capable of something I thought was impossible. And I was also a lurker in the beginning, so you probably didn't even know I existed at the time. You have no doubt helped more people than you will ever know about. And if I may say so, (a couple of days after Valentine's Day), I love you guys! So rant on. But keep spreading the word as well.

[philly33]

I am ready for all the good stuff and been ready.I am going on two months smoke free and I follow you Mr.Thomas and Thankyou 

[Giulia]

@kristen-9.7.15 "we don't want to admit or listen to others about our addiction. One day the messages you are sending will get through that thick cloud of smoke hanging over serial quitters head"  But you see that one day may make the difference in saving a life.  That 'one day' can't happen soon enough.  But it can happen later enough.  " there's always another day - except there isn't" (thomas)  So if we PRESS hard on the matter and it saves perhaps YEARS of life on the back-and-forth gerbil wheel of the serial quitter, it's worth the ire of that serial quitter to save them any ounce of breath that they will miss because they just waited too long and the hourglass of saving themselves from a smoking related disease - ran out.  That ire, however, does tends to cost us Elders emotionally.  A lot.  Hence rants like this of Thomas.  And I've had a few myself here.  We don't hang around here to lord it over anybody.  We hang around in the hopes of preventing the inevitability of the consequences of this addiction lording it over the addict.  Take what works for you, leave the rest - but at least keep an open mind.  The most defensive quitters are the most likely to fail.  In my 9 year's of  experience offering support on this site.

You make such an important point here, Kristen:  "WE DON'T WANT TO ADMIT OR LISTEN TO OTHERS ABOUT OUR ADDICTION."  Truth.  Plain and simple.  Because until we "get it," our addiction owns us.  We both have to learn to ADMIT and LISTEN in order to best this monster.  That's part of the education necessary.  And hopefully, that's the education we offer here.  

See what you've done here, Thomas - you've allowed us ALL to rant.  Thank you!  Give the guy a cigar - uh no, make that a badge!  HA!

[TerrieQuit]

You all, rock!

[Jpiecho]

Glad I checked in today. Best rant I've read in a while! 

[Pops]

Oh boy!  Are you on a roll or what!?  TY Thomas, and thanks for being here holding a continually lit torch for me when I came in here lost and beaten down.  You and the other elders here probably didn't have much faith in my quit, but you all seemed to have hope in my quit, and that hope I believe is what kept me thinking that I really did have a chance, and that not all was lost.  It took some seasoned elders on point for me to be able to get that part of the message.  For that, and many other factors as well, but especially for that one....I thank you from the bottom of my heart.  I am Pops, and today I am rocking a miraculous 269 days of freedom from the deadly grips of nicotine!  Woo Hoo!!!

Good night

[Stopforgood]

Thank you Thomas!  I see many new names here, hopefully they are here to seek and receive education, support and a certain friendship or connection, in Quitting.  I know it must be frustrating to you since you dedicate so much of your time and effort to research and sharing your knowledge, honesty and compassion.  I know that I personally and the Ex Community so much appreciate and respect you and your dedication to helping others.  You are a great example of the kindness, education and support so many of us seek here.  Be blessed and please continue your unselfish efforts to save the health and life of so many.  Lead on and Best of everything to you!

[Thomas3.20.2010]

Thank You ALL for the feedback and support! Each of you from the newest to the most Elder member means so much to me! The volcano has stopped erupting and is cooling down!

I recognize that this is the way of Addiction Recovery and well, Life in general! But I also know that the silent wheel doesn't get the oil!

Hopefully some folks will think about this before they come on bragging about how they figured a way to smoke and quit at the same time! It can't be done - no back doors you can leave cracked! No tricks that can beat the Law of Addiction! Just 100% commitment to forge forward however you want but with Not One Puff Ever! Smoking is not an Option!

These Years we've been doing this we have yet to see even one person do it successfully any other way! And as Giulia points out the sands of the hourglass are running each and every day! My friend @JoJo from New York  always says "You never know which Sickerette will be your Killerette!" She knows! She has had to have a lung transplant! But get her point - it isn't just living and dying - it's living a life of Quality! When I speak of Quality I include Spiritual Quality and Mental Quality right along with Physical Quality!

OK. Maybe I'm still ranting a bit - call these after-shocks! Just realize that here is the message:

Today is a Great Day to LIVE Smoke FREE!