Hello Everyone. I'm not new here and yet I am. I'm just as lost as if I were new because nothing is the same, not even most of my friends, I lost contact with them all. I hate that I kept leaving and coming back like I did. Writting my blogs and then erasing them. Erasing my mistakes was what I was doing. Trying to erase my failure. When what I really needed to be doing was saving it all to go back and read later, when I had finally quit. I lost my paper with my little name on it and my password, So I came back as someone else. Then a second time, I left and again lost my name and password. Now I have the regret for having not just logged off, saved my name and password, and come back. Everything you do and everything you write, can help someone else. Your failure, may be some else's ticket to quitting. Lucky me I kept a journal at home that I have been able to look back on and teach myself alot about all my failures. Really they weren't failures at all. I was just practicing for that one big Quit that would be all Mine......................... I did it. I QUIT.
You see, everything I did from beginning to end, led up to my quitting. I wasn't perfect the first time, or the second, or the third. The third time was not a charm for me. Maybe I am a bit stubborn. I guess I am to have continued to fight this battle I have with my addictive personality. But fight I have, and the 4th time has been really good for me. Would have been nice if I could have been so good as to get it the lst or 2nd time, but what the heck. The most important thing to me is , I Did Get It. I am now living a smoke free life.
I can't begin to write about all the things that I did leading up to this point. There's no way. And I can't name all the people that helped me to get to this point. But each and everyone of them played a major part in helping me to get here. I needed each and everyone of them. And they all were right here on Ex. This is where I met them. This was my support.
Okay let's see. After all my failure's, so to speak. I got on whyquit.com and I started reading. I made a mp3 player full of Joel's stuff and I listened. I went to the store and bought up on juices and water for a good 5 days or so. Hard candy and sugarless gum. I went to the Library and checked out Allen Carr's book, EasyWay to Quit Smoking, and I started reading. And reading, and reading. On my bathroom mirror, I wrote 2 things. 1. Decide you are going to quit and then commit to it and Do It. 2. Do not mope about it. Rejoice. You are FREE. And then if I felt like I needed to, I would be on my support sites in a flash yelling, Help, I want to Smoke.
So what worked for me. I committed to quit. I did quit. ANd I fought, and I still fight to make sure I stay positive and remember that , I want to quit. I Love being quit. Smoke Free is the ONLY way to be...............................................................
For those that don't remember me, I'm the brown haired lady that sat holding a guitar. I'm the one that kept struggling to hold onto a positive frame of mind, and just kept wollowing in self pitty because I didn't have enough faith in myself to realize that I could do it. I kept letting life get in the way. Excuses. Reasons. Crying. Pouting. I let my junkie brain rule me. I couldn't get past my own misery enough to hear and to see what everyone was saying......................................................
I'm still that brown haired lady. But I'm not struggling, crying, pouting, or letting my junkie brain rule me. When my junkie brain starts talking crap to me, Let Me Tell You, I LET MY JUNKIE BRAIN KNOW .............I QUIT, SO FORGET IT.
JUST DO IT. JUST STOP. JUST KICK IT IN THE BUTT.
I Quit Cold Turkey after smoking for over 30 years at 1 and 2 packs a day.
HAPPY AND SMOKE FREE FOR 40 SOMETHING AWESOME, WONDERFUL DAYS..................................................
