I know how you feel . I did great for a week. and then it all went to the dogs. I find that when I am really am stressed out I lose it and light up and the funny thing was I did not even smoke the whole thing. actually half of it burned up in the ash try while i was pacing. See I do not drink I learned a long time ago that alcohol and me do not get along at all. this is one of the few vices i have left. I guess i am getting to old for this s#@^. I have two beautiful granddaughters and 1 grandson and 4 sons and 1 daughter. I think it is amazing i never pulled all of my hair out.
It is cool I guess that the kids are supportive and remind me " mom you don't need it" the hard thiing is my husband won't quit and I just think it would be better if we quit together. He just does not get it. But I am thankful for my family and I want to be around to watch my grandkids grow up. I guess it is just a mind set. I have smoked for a long time (Over 20 years) I have quit several times and then when it seems like my life is falling apart I fall of the wagon like an alcohol hits the bottle. But I am not smoking the whole cigarette so i asked myself what are you doing????? some days I had a drag here and there and somedays I did not smoke at all. I guess that I just need to keep my prespective. thanks for being there it is appreciated. Sometimes I just feel like everyone thinks this is so easy and the reality for me is horsefeathers.... i know it is for the best but i really just need to escape and blow off steam or something need to find a new way to deal with the stress. any ideas????
