Hellloooo my ex-community! I realized I have not written in quite a while but I have maintained my quit for over 2 months now! It's been since April 29th since my last cigarette. Resetting twice after being closer to not smoking than I've ever been in my life proved to be pretty hard hitting. I have been on 2 camping trips since then and have not had a mess up. The first camping trip was harder then I ever thought possible but for some reason... it was the bump I needed to go through. After that weekend, with the triggers of drinking, friends who smoke, the overall camping experiences, I was so exhausted because I felt like my whole body was fighting trigger after trigger. Honestly, the only thing that kept me going was my friends. Including my friends that smoked. I asked for a cigarette at one point and my friend Ryan, who had never said no to me before said "Nope. I think you're committed to quitting this time and you are letting the drinking fog your mind". That made me step back and realize wow... I just almost ruined a month of not smoking for one cigarette that would have probably turned out to be a year of smoking?
After that it was just kind of... easier. The triggers were still there of course but that weekend was the hardest hill to climb so nothing seemed as hard.
The second camping trip was much easier, not easy but not as exhausting. Several of my family members smoke but I'm lucky enough that they knew I was getting far in my quit and kept it out of range for me.
With that said, I had my first nomad moment yesterday! I was actually kind of excited to have it and pass it hahah. It's weird right? We here about it so much from exers further in their journeys than we but when it finally happens, you don't realize that you just stepped into that phase. July 29th will be 3 months for me so this is how I know this was a NOMAD moment.
I was cleaning my room, I mean cleaning like purging when I wanted to take a break. It's important to note that I used to smoke in my bathroom ALL THE TIME. It's gross I know but then again, I was a smoker which is gross in general so I guess I didn't really care right? Anyways, it was one of the things that has been the hardest for me, not smoking in my bathroom. It was worse then in the car. Well, I go to organize it and instead of organizing I realize I am looking for my cigarettes. Like my body was just saying, okay time for a quick cig break then back to it. ummm... I stopped looking (Obviously, there were none in there) and I was super surprised. I know what you exers mean that it can sneak up on you. If I had been in a store and thought that, I probably would've just bought a pack and not realized it until I had the pack in my hand. Of course, I would've thrown it away and then wasted 8-9 dollars but it's better than wasting the last 3 months you know?
Anyways, this was a long entry and I'm glad to be back in touch with the ex group. I can't wait until I get to the 6 month line. I know I will, I can feel it. It's different this time 🙂
