home alone......day 57

[Debi12]

My husband has gone out of town until tomorrow. There is no chance that any other family members might  stop by tonight,,,,, so guess what my mind kept thinking today?  More than once the thought of stopping at the gas station on the way home from work ... yep!!!!  Thought about how I could smoke and no one would even know......I do not even want a cigarette!!!   I knew I would come straight home and get on this website until it gets to late to consider going out.  I feel bad that I even considered or thought about it, if I slipped up and smoked I would have to tell my husband and family - I couldn't hide smoking!!   In a way I feel stronger today - sort of like I passed a test!

stay strong, deep breaths, we can do this!!!

[cathi4]

These are the residual addiction patterns that are utterly normal. At first ,I was so mad that I would have to consider myself an addict forever. Then I understood that it was being on guard against myself. Sabotage by myself! I am proud that you have won this battle. Better yet that you understand the way the addiction process works. Never another puff! We deserve this new healthy, honest and ex smoker lifestyle! You Rock!

[butt-kicker]

Hiya Debi!!

Haha ,,it's funny how that evil little voice in our head shows up like that, huh?  Wow, I had a day like that once and by the end of it I was drained. It felt like an actual physical battle with, yep, myself! Haha I literally back-slapped myself a few times,,lol

It would be so easy to deceive, but in the end, the ones we're hurting the most is ourselves. We know that, that's why we're here, but still we keep telling ourselves this, over and over and over.

I am so proud of you and your strength!! You have come so far and you are one of my Heroes in this place!! I really do look up to you!! You are true to yourself & everyone here and I really admire that!

Keep it up!! Stay Strong & True!

Love & Hugs, my friend!

Diane

[pig_brotha]

Debi, the only person knowing your actions that matters is you. That is one thing has kept PB on the straight and narrow this time. It’s too easy to lie to everyone else. Your truth is yours. Keep it.

Hang in there! You can do it!

[here4help]

I just posted a blog and came back to read some others and we both had a rough day...crazy urges after making it this long...what's goin on?  We are not smokers, WE QUIT and we better keep it that way!!  Stay strong...we have this.

[molzep]

You hit one of you big triggers for the first time.  Earlier tonight I thought of you saying you sometimes would look forward to your husband going to bed so you could smoke.  Tonight I came home and my husband and son were staying at the basketball game, I got home and had the quick - time for a peaceful smoke thought!  It was pretty easy to kick the thought (my tough battles were earlier this week - smoother sailing now)

Anyway - sing to yourself "I am woman - I am strong"

Stay strong friend! Thoughts are just that, thoughts. Hit it over the head!

[sedwards]

Sounds like we all have that same "no one will ever know" thoughts.  It's nice to know I am not alone.  I am so glad you made it through the day...congrats.  Tomorrow will be better!!