I woke up this morning and thought "A week down, Yes!" Then it hit me that the rest of my life is going to be longer than this next week. I am not safe, not out of the woods, etc. But what I do have is awareness, some determination, and a set of tools to maintain this way of life. A dear friend texted and said, "Congratulations, you're a ex-smoker!" I have no known experience with that definition, thus it's a little hard to process. I fully realized that in this quit smoking deal, there is no quick fix, no magic pill to take. All I have is years of smoking and failed attempts at quitting to bring me to where I am now. And the only relevant question is "Do I want to go forward or backward?"
Today I could not stop thinking eating a piece of cake, I mean eating half a cake. One of those black forest cakes I went to 7-11 and bought some M&M's. I haven't been there since I quit and it seemed weird being at the counter with lingering thoughts of "Should I or shouldn't I?" It's weird going to 7-11 and throwing down a $5 and getting change back. Technically a small bag of M&M's has 2 servings (for whom, mice) So I ate the candy and felt kinda sick. I really haven't eaten any junk this last week.
So I guess the point of this is that there's no quick fix for this. We have to live it.
PS: How do we get rid of the North Face, Louis Vuitton, Coach Bag advertisements? I hope the people who are posting these realize that Karma is a Bitch.
