day 3, 2/23/12

[olykerry]

Today I put a patch on as soon as I woke up, and chewed some nicotine gum. Made breakfast for myself and a friend, and laughed instead of getting angry when a full container of cocoa powder fell out of my cabinets and all over the floor. Laughing things off and not smoking over them is a victory for me.

Put post-it notes with affirmations about not smoking and reasons I want to stay quit all over my house.

Took a nap in the afternoon with the patch on and had a terrible dream. Went to the gym, started to get a headache while exercising, took the patch off.

Talked to several friends who are nonsmokers and a friend who wants to quit about quitting. Experienced kind of a "pink cloud" feeling about becoming a nonsmoker. I am excited that my lung capacity is already improving, I am excited to never have to smoke again. It had been feeling like a trap for a long time; I had to interrupt whatever I was doing to go smoke.

Watched videos about nicotine receptors in the brain, began reading the quitsmokingonline.com site recommended in a comment.

My mental obsession with smoking is very strong and I noticed that tonight. For some reason I have more cravings at night and each time the thought pops into my head that I should go outside and smoke I have a little pang of disappointment and sadness when I consciously counter that with the thought that I don't smoke any more. I know that that grief feeling is a normal withdrawal symptom and I am relieved that it's fairly mild and manageable.  Overall I've had a pretty good day! I haven't gone more than a day without a cigarette in at least 14 years and I'm so excited that this isn't as horrible as I'd feared.

[jojo_2-24-11]

It's not horrible, it's a good thing and your heart and lungs are thanking you each time you don't have a cigarette.

[olykerry]

It's been really good, actually. I meant that I was scared before I quit that I would feel horrible. I was wrong to be too afraid to try to quit, and I'm surprised and glad that I feel good and the cravings and crankiness are mild and manageable 🙂

[melissa131]

Is it ok to wear a patch and chew nicotine gum? I'm seriously just asking, as gum made me feel sick, I didnt try a patch. I would just think that was a lot of nicotine.  I landed up quitting cold turkey. I say that, but I also am on Wellbutrin. 

anyway the laughing part IS the key, you are right. 

[gina58]

I had a lot of fear about how could I possibly exist without my ritualistic smoking.  It was such a trap for me.   And I've really had to fight at moments to maintain consciousness.  Meaning I will have to go "unconscious" to light up again and suck that burning smoke down into my lungs and for what!?  But those moments for me have been fleeting and manageable by taking the "one day at a time" approach.  That's all we ever have anyway, right?

Thanks also for your thoughts on my new members post.  A friend once told me that I'd quit when I was ready.  And that's what happened.  In reading your blogs you also sound "ready".  Keep writing, singing and breathing!  🙂

[craftylady]

I am in the pre-quitting phase - tapering off!  It is somewhat comforting to hear that everyone else has fears about this.  Feeling like you are saying goodbye to an old friend who has been there threw your roughest times with you.  I know it is a toxic friendship and it needs to go!! 

Olykerry, it sounds like you are quite a fitness and health person.  I unfortunately wasn't.  I used to weigh close to if not over 300 pounds.  I have lost over a 100 now and have fears of gaining during weight during the quitting process.  Do you have any suggestions, well other than the obvious of not stuffing my face!  LOL  Or does anyone else have any ideas???  Any ideas for a beginning excercise program that a formally huge lady could start???  Been walking.

[olykerry]

@Melissa - yes, it's ok to use a patch and gum at the same time, I didn't know that either but my partner was told that by a Quitline coach and there's a video about it in the videos section on this site. I ended up feeling a little ill with both yesterday so I took the patch off and am not wearing one today, just using lozenges/gum/inhaler.

@Gina58- The "when you're ready" part is what a lot of my now nonsmoking friends have told me, too. I've tried to quit at least 10 other times but this time spent a few months thinking about getting ready, wanting to be ready, and talking and asking about what it would feel like to be done. My repeated sinus infections have been a new bottom for me with smoking. I had a great talk with a therapist friend where she asked me what I would feel like if all my fears about what it would be like to be quit didn't exist, and that got me thinking about solutions instead of just staying scared to try. Taking it a day at a time is helping a lot!

@craftylady- I like your analogy about it being a toxic friendship, I definitely feel that way! Tapering is great, I switched back to light cigarettes after a few years on full flavored and that helped to prepare me too. I am pretty new at being a fitness and health person and I'm still a big lady although I've lost about 100lbs, I started going to the gym in December 2011 when I realized I couldn't walk more than 5 minutes without feeling winded. I weighed somewhere between 330-350 at my heaviest, I don't really know. I started really small and with acceptance that I might not be able to do as much exercise or lose as much weight as I thought I should. I stick to 98% healthy eating (I eat lots of whole foods and avoid refined sugars). Music is important to motivate me, I have a hard time working out without my iPod! So starting small, being gentle with myself, and recognizing that a little exercise is better than none have been important to keep me motivated and consistently improving my fitness regardless of what the scale is doing 🙂

Thanks for your support and feedback and encouragement, everyone! I'm excited to follow your progress and get to know you!

[olykerry]

er, I started going to the gym in December 2010 not 2011 🙂 spaciness is definitely a withdrawal symptom I'm experiencing!

[melissa131]

Hi, yeah nicotine is a stimulant, so I took a lot of naps. 

Here is an article about Nicotine replacement, I tried the E-cig , the gum before I truly quit. They both made me sick, the E cig gave me a head ache. I did find some stuff on the internet that said a patch and gum is ok, but it seems to me like more nicotine than when you smoke. Either way those things do help in that you realize how gross cigarettes are when you are not smoking them. 

I listen to my Ipod while I wait for the bus, that used to be a big trigger for me. It really helps, and on the bus! 

I wrote a dear john letter to cigarettes. Counceling helps too, did that also. check out this article I found on Whyquit.com. What I did was go to whyquit everyday in the first few weeks. It's really helpful, especially the part about blood sugar, because when you with draw from nicotine your blood sugar dips. And possibly just when you with draw from cigarettes -because of the nasty chemicals in there, so it helps to drink some juice on those first few days. 

http://whyquit.com/whyquit/a_realworldnrt.html

You can do this, this site has saved so many people keep coming here  and blogging, if you feel like smoking blog about it, and we will stop you. 

I have been quit for 4 Months, 2 Weeks, 1 Day, 22 hours, 54 minutes and 31 seconds (138 days). I have saved $903.19 by not smoking 2,779 cigarettes. I have saved 1 Week, 2 Days, 15 hours and 35 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 10/9/2011 10:47 AM