Why Me????

[babygirl22]

My quit day is tomorrow, and i cut down on my smoking today thinking maybe it will help with the urge tomorrow and having a history of depression and anxiety and now im pregnant soo my emotions are all over the place makes this hard.. I am already feeling a little sad and angry at the same time i really want to get through this without any of the mood swings i keep thinking to myself what happens if i FAIL???

[JonesCarpeDiem]

if you fail you figure out what choice you made that made you smoke and you avoid that choice the next time until you get it right.

[YoungAtHeart]

Don't worry about what MIGHT happen until it does and then you will deal with it!\  Come here and ask for advice and support when you need it.  We will all be here, waiting to help you be successful.

I was terrified of failure when I first quit, too.  A friend sent this quote to me which really helped:(by Henry Ford):  "If you think you can or think you can't, you are right."  Think you CAN!

Nancy

Quit 7/4/12

[scubavernie]

One day at a time, you can do it. Read my first blog about smoking with a small baby, the never ending guilt is horrible, the work you put in now will be worth 10 times more later on trust me. Please don't fall down the same trap I did.  

I didn't smoke when I was pregnant, but one evening I did drink two glasses of wine and felt slightly flushed and spent a night worrying about what I had done to the baby inside me. I couldn't imagine the guilt x 4000 toxins from cigarettes. 

You really have come to the right place, tomorrow is your quit date, be strong, and we are all here for you. 

[Giulia]

If you commit and persevere you will succeed. There are many on here with anxiety and depression who have conquered this, and you can too.  Mood swings are a part of the game.  Sometimes the swing is motionless, sometimes it goes high, and sometimes your stomach drops on the backswing.  Just what's so.  Are you willing to take the ride?  Are you willing to do whatever it takes to free yourself from this addiction?  If you say "yes" to both of those, you'll have a greater chance of sucess..  It's empowering - GO FOR IT WITH GUSTO!

[freedom-38]

How about think about what happens if you DON'T fail?

I bet that will feel good!!

[barbara42]

do not have the word fail in your mind, to do so, leaves the posibility, you are the boss of you and you will do it, i know it is not all that easy, but it is not all that hard either, just get a good mind set and failure has no room !

[Nyima_1.6.13]

Try to stay away from the would have, should have, could haves! Stay in the moment and don't worry so much about tomorrow! One hour, one day at a time!

[kathy199]

Babygirl, i just quit 24 days ago. I suffer from depression, anxiety and IBS (irritable bowel syndrome). I have unexpected moments where I cannot control my diahhrea and must be careful where I am at.

I know that I will have depression, anxiety and IBS whether I smoke or not. Smoking does not CURE depression, smoking does not CURE anxiety, nor does smoking CURE IBS. What I do know is that smoking can kill me. I totally understand your fear, it has been my fear for many, many years. I have made cigarettes my friend, my support system, my "only you know what my life is like" pal. 

Please read Allen Carr's book. You will be awakened, you will learn that cigarettes (a nicotine delivery system) will not make your life better or more manageable.

Instead of feeling sad and angry, feel liberated! You, you! You have opened your life to a life stripped of the chains of a slavery. The nicotine monster no longer has a hold on you. You are free. You are in control of your life and you choose only GOOD things for this life!

Power to you baby girl!

[erict]

Hi there.  Minus the pregnant part, I think I can relate a bit.  I was diagnosed with depression WHOOOO a long time ago.  And then bipolar about five years ago.  Cigarettes were part of my self-medication, and they are the last thing I've got to let go.  It sucks.  It feels like the cards are stacked against you, but damnit you are strong enough to do this!  I don't have the quitting experience these others have, but I have a sense of what you'll go through, but see the light at the end of the tunnel.  You conquer this, you not only conquer cigarettes, but you also will be able to say to yourself, My other conditions will not dictate an unhealthy lifestyle or an unfulfilling life. 

SI SE PUEDE!  YES WE CAN! 🙂

[michelle198]

Babygirl,

     I have Major Depressive Disorder along with Generalized Anxiety.  I was also a licensed Mental Health Practitioner.  None of it matters.  Psychologically speaking, don't terrorize yourself.  It will make your mental health symptoms worse and you will become overwhelmed much easier, decreasing your fighting power.  Breath.  Do your very best.  If, I hope not, you wind up smoking one cigarette tomorrow, congratulate yourself for not smoking two.  If you break down and light up and take a puff, you can always put it out after that puff.  Do NOT make it into an absolute, all or nothing, pass or fail situation. Do your very best and everyday your very best will be better than the day before.  Be KIND to yourself.  Every little bit of progress you make, acknowledge it.  If you take some of the pressure off, you will be less scared.   

[joyeuxencore]

Sweet baby girl...what reading have you done? What have you got in your "quit kit" for tomorrow? Have you made a list of the reasons you want to quit to be able to re-read? What will you DO instead of smoke? Be PREPARED not SURPRISED...you must be ready! Then you can get through it! We all have and you have a bigger motivation than most...the health and well being of the life you carry within you...You CAN do this...You must be willing to ride out the uncomfortable feelings until they subside...the cravings PASS whether or not you smoke...xo

[joyeuxencore]

My BFF skygirl  who helped me stay quit wrote this:

Many people decide to quit cigarettes on the spur of the moment. They may have been thinking that they WANT to quit for a long time, but the actual moment is a knee-jerk response to smoking too much the night before or some other trigger that makes them toss the pack in the trash and declare, "That's it. I'm done with cigarettes!". And then they feel really good about it...until the first craving hits them and they can't figure out how to get through it. So they say, "Ohhhh, this is TOO hard. I can't do it!". And then they smoke.

They did not PREPARE for their Quit. And as Miguel de Cervantes said, "Forewarned, forearmed; to be prepared is half the victory. (Good old Miguel wrote "Don Quixote" Here's a pic of him. Isn't he cute?

And he wasn't just a pretty face! He was right about this.

Forewarned? It means gather knowledge about your enemy (nicotine), it means learn all that you can about addiction, about quitting, about what works and what doesn't work. It means listen to the folks who have already quit successfully here on EX and take their advice seriously. Do the reading. Do the Tracking and Separation exercises here on EX. Understand your addiction BEFORE you attempt to quit.

Forearmed? It means spending time thinking about, and choosing, how you will handle cravings. These are the weapons with which you will be forearmed (a fancy way of saying "armed beforehand", get it?) To do this, I suggest you start with two separate lists.

The first list is "Things I will DO when I am Craving". This should be small simple tasks or activities, such as take out the trash, play solitaire, start a load of laundry, do 15 jumping jacks, trim your toenails, go yell at the people who work for you (ok, maybe not THAT), a crossword puzzle book, write a real postcard to someone, rearrange your desk, call your mother, take the dog for an extra walk, clean out your kitchen junk drawer, play Angry Birds...you get the idea, right?

The second list is "Things I will Put into My Mouth INSTEAD of Cigarettes". (No,no, don't go there, please.) These are oral substitutes. Flavors and textures that will distract your senses from a craving, and keep your mouth busy until the craving passes. The obvious things are gum, hard candies and mints. But think outside the box, too. Other items on this list could be licorice sticks, whole cloves, olives, flakes of red pepper, Cheerios (one at a time, like a baby does), teeny cubes of cheese, a sprinkle of cinnamon sugar on your tongue, pistachios, butter rum Lifesavers, swigs of bottled water, a Tootsie Roll Pop, sticks of fresh zucchini, cherry tomatoes, a spoonful of peanut butter...have I got you thinking?

Now, assemble your "weapons" against the cravings. Buy or find the items on these lists that will allow you to put these ideas into actual practice when a craving hits. Find a suitable totebag or box. This is your "Quit Kit" (Yes, I know some of this sounds juvenile but, guess what? Dying from nicotine is serious and you need an arsenal to beat your addiction.) Don't forget to include your two lists in your Kit. During the first days of your Quit, and for as long as necessary, keep your Quit Kit near you. And utilize it when the urge to smoke hits you. When a craving comes over you, you can just, oh, say, grab a handful of breadsticks and go run around the block while you munch on them. Or how about crack open a can of coconut water and go paint your fingernails? Or eat six black olives while dancing around the coffee table, humming ABBA songs?

Finally, don't forget the most super-secret effective Crave Buster EVER: Bite into a whole lemon, peel and all. Nothing will kill a crave faster. I promise.

The point is this, folks; IF you prepare properly for your Quit, you are more likely to succeed. Don't just sit there and feel reeeeaallly bad when a crave comes over you! Take ACTION until the crave ebbs away.

"Forewarned, forearmed; to be prepared is half the victory". It works. And if I can quit, YOU can quit, too!

(getting down off my soapbox) xxxooo, Sky

[joyeuxencore]

Skygirl also wrote this...WOW...rereading her posts still helps me...I just spent some time going bach through her history of blogs since before she quit...no wonder she made it! It is a great distraction to go to people's pages and read their blog history...I am so grateful...I would SO like to watch you get that way! xo

1) Smoking a cigarette does NOT calm you down, ease your stress, make you happier or more able to cope. All that smoking a cigarette does is increase the level of nicotine in your body, which holds off the effects of withdrawal that started when you finished your last cigarette.

2) You do not enjoy smoking. What you are enjoying is NOT feeling a low level of nicotine in your body.

3) Educating yourself about nicotine addiction gives you a HUGE advantage in successfully quitting.

4) The way you THINK about quitting is absolutely KEY.

It is important that you banish the concepts of "trying", "attempting", "hoping it works", "wish me good luck".

It is important that you read enough about quitting until your thinking does a complete 180 degree turn from "giving up something", "sacrificing something I love", "doing without", "getting through this" into "FREEDOM".

Freedom from what? From a life that is ruled by an addiction, freedom to enjoy better health, freedom from guilt and shame, freedom from worrying when and where you can have your next cigarette, freedom from the panic when you realize you are out of cigarettes, freedom from smelling like an ashtray, freedom from hiding and making excuses.

And don't forget to think about all the free time you will gain, the money you will save, and the self-esteem that will rocket upwards when you quit.

So get that thinking flipped around so you are ready to quit successfully!

5) You CAN quit. Your addiction is no stronger and no harder to beat than anyone else's. If we can quit, then you can quit. We can ALL quit.

6) Yes, the first few days of quitting are not very pleasant. In fact, they suck. Completely suck.

But if you prepare in advance for how to handle those first days, you will make the whole process go a lot easier for yourself.

Listen to the advice of those who have already achieved what you came here to achieve.

Then FOLLOW that advice. Don't just read it in the blogs and think, "hmm, yeah, that sounds good".

You must actually do the things that have been PROVEN to help make you a successful quitter.

7) Be HAPPY. This is one of the best decisions you will ever make for yourself. Be excited to do this. And be VERY, VERY proud of yourself. We are. And we will be here to help you all the way...

xxxooo,

Sky