Tomorrow is my quit day

[shelby33]

Tomorrow is my quit day and I am anxious.  I have told myself i'm going to quit a thousand times and when the day comes I never do it, so I signed up on this website to see if having community could help.  I am 36 and have smoked since I was 14, a pack or more a day.  I feel extremely addicted to cigarettes and it's pretty much my last vice that I need to deal with.  My daughter is 8 and obviously hates that I smoke, she will sometimes stand in front of the door to stop me.  For myself and for her, I want to quit. I want to be here for her in the future and show her that people can change and be healthy. My daughter is with me 3 to 4 days out of the week and lives with her father the other time, so I am alone alot and need a place where i can talk if i'm feeling weak. Thanks

[Minx]

I too have a beautiful little girl looking to me to set a positive example and smoking has been an agonizing source of guilt.  I am almost 3 weeks into my new life as a non-smoker and it is hard, but SO rewarding at the same time because I have resolved that internal conflict raging within me in regards to my daughter.

You CAN do this!  You WILL do this!  How nice is it that tomorrow when you wake up, you can start the day by saying, smoking- I don't do that anymore.

How are you going to start the day?  My first day was waking up first to enjoy a steaming cup of coffee while I perused inspirational blogs on this website - a hearty breakfast of 'quitergy' lol.  Take it one day, one crave, one moment at a time.  Revel in the uninterrupted time you will have with your daughter now and the ease in your heart everytime you look at her - knowing that you are setting a positive example and doing what you can to ensure that you will be there for her first love, heartbreak, graduation, wedding (!!).  I didn't realise HOW much a mother is needed until I had my own child and realised how much I still needed MY Mom.

I will be thinking of you tomorrow morning as I wake up and renew my commitment to being a nonsmoker for life!

[djmurray]

Shelby, you've totally come to the right place.  PLEASE read Allen Carr's book The EasyWay to Quit Smoking.  It totally changed the way I look at smoking, and I had smoked for 53 years!  Here's a link to the free online pdf version.  If you can, start reading it tonight!  The secret to a successful and happy quit is getting your head in the right place.  If you feel deprived you'll fight every crave and that will exhaust you and you will eventually give in.  If you realize you're giving up NOTHING you can get through the craves without fighting them but understanding that this is how you get to the other side.  Pretty soon the craves go away except for an occasional flare up, and you can laugh at that crave and say "I don't do that anymore."

http://media.wix.com/ugd/74fa87_2010cc5496521431188f905b7234a829.pdf

Seriously, the best thing you can do is start reading this book tonight.  And you don't have to not be smoking when you read it.  It's easy and valuable reading.

Come back often and this community will be a tremendous support.  Read the blogs and comment on them and blog yourself.  The more involved you are the more you will trust that this community cares about you and wants to help in any way we can to help you make this your forever quit.

[Sootie]

Hello----if you really want to quit you have found the BEST place ever for support!

I hope you will take some time and read about addiction, smoking and quitting. Even if you think you know everything about it (as I did) read again. I found that whyquit.com has excellent articles on everything we worry about when quitting. And, of course, stick close to this site and keep blogging. you will soon meet the whole community and have more support than you thought possible.

Welcome to EX-----we are all here for each other.

[linda258]

It is normal to feel anxious... but understand that not only can you do this ... let your mind know THAT YOU WILL QUIT.  In part staying on track is really all in your mind.  You don't have smoke... you actually don't want to smoke and you will think gee... I really, really have to smoke (crave)... but guess what.. you don't.  You won't die if you don't smoke (but will if you continue).... you will live through the crave and then have a period when you don't think about smoking until you have a trigger i.e.  something that reminds you that you are supposed to smoke... like you eat a meal.. the old you gets up and goes out and smokes...BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT.

So, in the end it really is about control.... do you want to control what you do and when or do you want Nic (your addiction) to control you ... take your money and your health? 

Step one make the decision.... make a promise to yourself that you will not take one puff... no matter what... and once you make it through at least one day you will be able to tell yourself ... it is ok ... YOU CAN DO THIS! 

[djmurray]

Here's something I posted a couple of times that might help you put this in perspective.

  

   

How do you feel about a friend who has to go everywhere with you? Not only does he tag along all the time, but since he is so offensive and vulgar, you become unwelcome when with him. He has a peculiar odor that sticks to you wherever you go. Others think both of you stink.

   

He controls you totally. When he says jump, you jump. Sometimes in the middle of a blizzard or storm, he wants you to come to the store and pick him up. You would give your spouse hell if he or she did that to you all the time, but you can't argue with your friend. Sometimes, when you are out at a movie or play he says he wants you to go stand in the lobby with him and miss important scenes. Since he calls all the shots in your life, you go. Your friend doesn't like your choice of clothing either. Instead of politely telling you that you have lousy taste, he burns little holes in these items so you will want to throw them out. Sometimes, he tires of the furniture and gets rid of it too. Occasionally, he gets really nasty and decides the whole house must go.

   

He gets pretty expensive to support. Not only is his knack of property destruction costly, but you must pay to keep him with you. In fact, he will cost you thousands of dollars over your lifetime. And you can count on one thing, he will never pay you a penny in return.

   

Often at picnics you watch others playing vigorous activities and having lots of fun doing them. But your friend won't let you. He doesn't believe in physical activity. In his opinion, you are too old to have that kind of fun. So he kind of sits on your chest and makes it difficult for you to breathe. Now you don't want to go off and play with other people when you can't breathe, do you?

   

Your friend does not believe in being healthy. He is really repulsed by the thought of you living a long and productive life. So every chance he gets he makes you sick. He helps you catch colds and flu. Not just by running out in the middle of the lousy weather to pick him up at the store. He is more creative than that. He carries thousands of poisons with him which he constantly blows in your face. When you inhale some of them, they wipe out cilia in your lungs which would have helped you prevent these diseases.

   

But colds and flu are just his form of child's play. He especially likes diseases that slowly cripple you - like emphysema. He considers this disease great. Once he gets you to have this, you will give up all your other friends, family, career goals, activities - everything. You will just sit home and caress him, telling him what a great friend he is while you desperately gasp for air.

   

But eventually your friend tires of you. He decides he no longer wishes to have your company. Instead of letting you go your separate ways, he decides to kill you. He has a wonderful arsenal of weapons behind him. In fact, he has been plotting your death since the day you met him. He picked all the top killers in society and did everything in his power to ensure you would get one of them. He overworked your heart and lungs. He clogged up the arteries to your heart, brain, and every other part of your body. In case you were too strong to succumb to this, he constantly exposed you to cancer causing agents. He knew he would get you sooner or later.

   

Well, this is the story of your "friend," your cigarette. No real friend would do all this to you. Cigarettes are the worst possible enemies you ever had. They are expensive, addictive, socially unacceptable, and deadly. Consider all this and NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF!

  

[mlpepsi517]

Welcome to the Ex!  I was in your shoes once, where I would set the date and then well chicken out or make a thousand and one excuses why I can do it another day.  I have quit numerous times before getting where I am at today.  I couldn't have done it without all my family here at the Ex!  

You have come to one of the most amazing sites and people and experiences than you could ever imagine.  The most important thing you can do is educate yourself about your addiction.  Stay close and blog as often as you need.  Thats what we are all here for. 

Stay strong stay positive and you will succeed.

Best wishes for a successful quit!!!!

[John10forteen]

Hi Shelby, YOU will love it! 

I am 150 something days smokefree. I'm older and smoked longer and no children. These are three more reason you have to quit than I had to quit. It is SO AMAZING after you get through the first few days.

A day or so ago I blogged about the fear of my first days and my aha moment on day19. Click this link if you'd like to read A Welcomed Visitor  (I could've easily smoked this winter but I didn't)

You have much to think about and do it you will. Check with us tomorrow ok?

[Junior7]

Welcome!  So glad you are here!