With prior quits, I'd always have a pre-determined threshold where I would cease being a non smoker and resume smoking. Basically I always gave myself 'an out' to start smoking again, in the event something really bad were to happen (ie. the death of a loved one). Prior to this quit, I was never faced with such a challenge. Instead I would find good excuses to smoke well in advance of tragedy. For example, a fight with a loved one was a good reason to light up; several cold beers, with good company; or.....dropping a spoon on the kitchen floor; a much too cloudy Wednesday; or traumatic childhood memories of "Punky Brewster" not being renewed for a 3rd season. My point is that I always gave myself an excuse to smoke again. The old, "I don't care because..." or "This awful, horrible thing happened and therefore I am going to go buy a pack of cigarettes and smoke."
Now I know I am not conditionally quitting. Bad things happen. Smoking will not help. The same problem(s) exists once that rancid burning filter is discarded. Except now you have a new problem. Nicotine addiction. I Really used to think sickorettes helped me cope with life, made me happier. In retrospect, I now realize it did the exact opposite.
I'd rather be an ex-smoker who thinks about smoking once in a while than a smoker who thinks about quitting all of the time. I used to be the latter. No more. I have new found freedom. I Quit: 6 months and 1 or 2 days ago. Newbies, you too can do this too. I am not special or gifted. You too can do this. Stay the Course and Stay Close!
