My last day of smoking, is today, Feb 10. I'm pretty excited to begin my new life aas a non smokers tomorrow (Feb 11).
Initially, I thought about moving and/or cancelling my quit date for two reasons: a feeling that I hadn't prepared enough (despite the fact that my life, for the last 3 1/2 weeks, has consisted of nothing but) and the worry of temptation that I live with two very heavy smokers.
I had two revelations/epiphanies/sources of divine inspiration (whatever you want to call it).
The first was a quote by Marianne Williamson I read recently, ""‘Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond imagination. It is our light more than our darkness which scares us. We ask ourselves – who are we to be brilliant, beautiful, talented, and fabulous. But honestly, who are you to not be so?" Beyond my own self-sabotage tendencies, I remembered that there is absolutely nothing to lose (what the hell did cigarettes ever do for me, anyway, other than make me physically, emotionally, and spiritually sick?)
The second realization was about choice. I can't control the world/the choices of others any more than I can prevent the sun from rising. Chances are that, throughout my life, I will be surrounded by many people, some smokers and some not. Still, just because some people choose to smoke, that doesn't have effect my choice [to be a non smoker] unless, of course, I choose for it to.
Regardless, I'm not delusional; I know I have a vicious, chain-reaction poison coursing through my brain and veins, and I know it's going to try and pull all its old tricks. But, as the saying goes, "Nothing worth doing is ever easy"
