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Share your quitting journey

The Bucket List

Thomas3.20.2010
2 10 166

Suppose just for a minute that you have been given that ultimate prognosis. You have weeks to live. Time to get your Bucket List together because this is it!

What would you include on this list? Smoking????

Really???? You want to die trapped in Addiction?

Well, I want to tell you about some EXers I’ve had the true honor to know and about one Exer I never met but came to know through his legacy to BecomeanEX.

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Let’s start with Ray ManOfSteele.

Ray didn’t start out here. He came to BecomeanEx from another site and brought many of his Elder Friends with him.  Ray quit smoking on 04/04/04. He wrote his first Blog here on May 21, 2008 when BecomeanEX was in it’s infancy.

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/ManOfSteele-blog/2008/05/22/get-some-love-here-247-365

That’s the kind of Man our Superhero was!

He also brought with him the famous Bonfires and Daily Pledges that to this day save lives!

Giulia created Relapse Traps because of him.

G reminds me that it’s BECAUSE of him, because he brought a bunch of Elders with strong quits and compassion to this, at-the-time fledgling on-line quit support community to pave the way for the next generation of supporters, that it has become what it has become.

 We all have HIM to Thank for that!

Unfortunately, Ray wrote his last blog on June 12, 2009.

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/ManOfSteele-blog/2009/06/12/u-can-have-a-smoke-free-life

You see, he passed away – but he never chose to smoke before he passed!

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Doris was a quiet dignified Lady. She was a faithful Friend and calm support to all who knew her.

When Doris wrote her first Blog, she already had 4 Weeks and 3 Days under her belt.

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Doris-blog/2009/02/06/giving-up-smoking

 

She had smoked her last on January 18, 2009 but still didn’t know if she would make it to FREEDOM!

Every Month Doris wrote a Blog for the entire first Year and going back to read them now you can watch an amazing transformation right in front of you! SHE MADE IT!

And she never looked back to the day she passed away on February 4, 2013. Doris had 3 Years of FREEDOM and she lived N.O.P.E. to the end even when her Nephew died of Stage IV Lung Cancer at age 39!

She never gave up or gave in!

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Then there was Dawn. I knew Dawn as a loving Mother , Grandmother  and marvelous Friend. Dawn quit smoking September 17, 2009. Here’s her very first Blog:

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Dawn4-blog/2009/09/17/quit-day

Dawn made it a point of encouraging her Friends and never judging them. Her support was pure LOVE! Tommy once said of her:

“Our Dawn was a fine EXample of facing life, and sticking to your commitments!

 During the last year and a half of her life she fought a cancer that has no cure. She knew she was going to die. And she lived in constant pain

. But, never once did she back down from her two big commitments in life. Her faith in God, and her commitment to never smoke again.

 A doctor once asked  her how she knew she would never smoke again, and she replied "Because, I would rather die than smoke another cigarette!". That is commitment!

 As far as her faith, a few weeks before she died, one of her daughters did something that made her proud, and she told me (not for the first time) "I am His favorite, I tell you!" 

In spite of the pain and suffering she was going through, she still believed she was God's favorite child!”

Dawn wrote her last Blog on April 26, 2012.

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Dawn4-blog/2012/04/27/things-that-make-me-go-hmmmmmmmmmmm

Sadly she passed away a few days later on May 14. She never once decided to smoke!

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MamaDeb wrote her first Blog on Day 41 of her quit.

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/mamadeb-blog/2010/06/04/need-some-help

Deb was a confusing combination of vegetarian/health nut who smoked! She saw the conflict in values and chose to quit.

I knew MamaDeb better than most I suppose. You see, we had something in common – COPD.  Deb followed Aunt Dee and myself to another site where we focused on emphysema.

 She was always cheerful and optimistic when she wrote. Deb said, “I feel like I could do just about anything!” She believed that we could quit and we did! 

Not once in all the communications I had with Deb did she ever complain! She was so proud of her Family and she became proud of Herself!

As I got to know her, Deb wanted the best for everybody and she was too far down on her own priority list! Even knowing how sick she was, she was seriously considering going back to school to become certified in respiratory care.

This Lady so full of Life and Love and Hopes and Plans for the Future passed away just short of one Year smoke FREE! But she never gave up her Quititude!

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You know you are FREE when you can believe that given the word of your last Earthly days you know in your heart

Not One Puff Ever!

10 Comments
JonesCarpeDiem

Not One Puff Ever

No Matter What Life Holds, Smoking Is Not Required.

Live the best quality of life you are able!

MarilynH
Member

Wow, this blog has filled my eyes with tears thanks for sharing this with all of us. Life without cigarettes is the only life worth living. 

sparky26
Member

You should have put a warning on this blog: I love this site !

Strudel
Member

Thomas  - What a special and powerful blog! Thank you!

pir8fan
Member

You bring tears to my eyes as well! You speak here of those who not only made a comittment to quit, but they made a comittment to helping others! What better use of Freedom than to share it with others!

Of the four listed above, Dawn was a close personal friend, both here on the site, and in person! Dawn spent the last year and a half of her life about 3 hours and 12 minutes from me! I made many trips to see her! I marveled at the strengh and courage that Lady had as she gave her energy to others! Chemo three days a week, Dialysis three days a week! And on Sunday she rested! But, we were always on her mind! And in her prayers! I had the opportunity to spend Easter weekend with Dawn at about the time that she wrote her last blog here. I took her to Disney and we spent Easter Sunday morning at The House of Blues Sunday Gospel Brunch! I had to carry her from her wheelchair to our front row table! The vision of her there with her head thrown back, and her eyes closed, as she clapped her hands to the music, will live in my head for as long as I am here on earth!

The gifts these people gave to this site are impossible to duplicate! We can only honor their legacy by doing our best to help those who come next!

And, if I may quote Dawn, WOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

nanawendy
Member

What a powerful blog that brought tears to my eyes as well.  I did not have the pleasure of knowing these Exers, but I believe that they paved the way for me and everyone that started this journey behind them.. True meaning of committment

 

keep calm and carry on

wendy

12/31/12

freeneasy
Member

Thanks for writing this Thomas. It's important  for those of us who came here after these people to learn about them and their contributions. If it was not for them, this site would not be what it is now.

smorgy8513
Member

Thomas, thank you for sharing about these forerunners and inspirations.    I wish I would have known them.       Yet, I am blessed with knowing you and others who inspire me each and every day and help me keep my quit.

Love you!

Sharon

Sootie
Member

Our EX Hall of  Fame.

Like Dawn----I have a strong faith that tells me they are all with us still -----they grieve over our losses and take pride in our successes.

Make them proud.

CommunityAdmin
Community Manager
Community Manager

Thanks Thomas!

Mark
EX Community Manager

About the Author
63 years old. 20 year smoker. 11 Years FREE! Diagnosed with COPD. Choosing a Quality LIFE! It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. -Galatians 5:1