Stronger Than Your Past

[Storm.3.1.14]

  Early in my quit, I remember someone here openly relapsing, and I had thought to myself, "If   that is my inevitable fate, too, then just give me the cigarettes   NOW and let’s be done with it!"

  That was   very early in my quit, before   time and   experience allowed me to   embrace the concept that, when faced with the exact same stressors, I was now both   willing to and training to react in   other ways. I’m still open to new   relapse prevention strategies, even to this day, and I'm coming to   believe in these skill sets as   a new way of living. 

  A few extra thoughts...

  If I were to be blindside today by something horrible, I would not run out and get drunk. Why? Because I am not an alcoholic, and booze is not my drug. It does not occur to me to drown my anger with hard liquor or wine, because that was never my pattern or addiction. The idea of getting stressed out and getting drunk, to me, is quite foreign and weird.

  No, I am a nicotine- and cigarette-addict. I was for 28 years. Sadly, because of that incessant repetition, I am hardwired now to automatically and reflexively “jump” at a pack of menthol cigarettes in times of stress. That is the heartbreaking thing I have done to myself, and I am not proud of it.   But, it's my reality. So, I must   deal with my   truths,   manage the realities of my   recovery,   accept my progress as genuine and bankable, and   embrace the promise that this process leads to the way out of the tunnel.

  What's my advice for   you, new quitter?   Get stronger than your past. That’s it. That’s all we ask anyone to do. You don’t have to be stronger far beyond the actual number of days you‘ve earned on your clock. No, you only have to get stronger and smarter than the person you were yesterday. And then, with a few victories under your belt,   you must choose to want your new life more than your past mistakes. And, above all else, you’ll need to eventually   accept that craving a smoke may be your habitual reflex, but it is no longer your active choice or real-life option.

   STORM: 514

  (This was a comment that I posted for JACKIE back in May. I reworked it a bit to turn it into this blog.)

[LouiseR]

Love GET STRONGER THAN YOUR PAST!! 

[elvan]

This is GREAT, Storm, it really hits everything, I am glad you reworked this as a blog!

[Summer-Rain]

I love it and thanks for sharing.

The journey continues.

[Terri103]

I want to contact Admin.  This needs to be added to the reading, and to the NML reading.  This is very well written and I think is a good way to address issues that new quitters, those struggling, and even relapsers.  VERY WELL SAID!!

[JACKIE1-25-15]

I like it.  Get stronger than your past. That should be helpful. In my past I would someohow lose when I would get into a heated disagreement with my father.  Presently I am being tested in the arena.  I made a promise that I would not allow him to cause me to be so upset that I would be blowing steam.  Six months I have changed I no longer blow steam.  I blow air.

[MarilynH]

Thank you for sharing this wonderful blog. 

Marilyn 

[TerrieQuit]

Great blog Storm! Thanks for sharing it!

Terrie  24  DOF

[Strudel]

Thanks Storm! 

[nanawendy]

Get Stronger than your past, I love it , Storm . That's something that a nicotine addict must strive for everyday. At 949 smoke free days, I am still getting stronger than my past, one day at a time

keep calm and carry on

Wendy

12/31/12

[bonniebee]

 For many years I used alcohol and cigarettes for stress release I don't drink anymore and through the years I have learned that drinking never did any good thing for me in fact it made my stress worse and now even in the worst situations I never turn to drink I don't even think of doing it ! I mention this because it gives me hope that someday I will never even think to turn to a cigarette no matter what !

Thanks for this great blog Storm !

[marilyn_marmac]

Strong, Stronger, Strongest---I see all of that in you!  You are wise my son. 

[exsmokermom]

Good blog, Storm.  Thank you.

[jacks1125]

great blog!!

[NewEnglander]

Thank you so much for sending this my way.  I plan to print this blog and post it on my apartment door.  

When the stress is here I don't always have the presense of mind to reach for the literature but this blog will hit me in the face as I start out tthe door to find relief.

Again, thanks.

Victoria

[hattie]

Well said!

[Sooz3]

Love, love, love this blog, just what I needed to reaffirm everything today, thanks Storm!

[djmurray]

Storm, you hit on something I have never thought of and I find it absolutely key to this whole quit thing.  When something horrible or great or stressful or sad or happy happens I never EVER think of getting drunk.  That's not my drug.  WOW.  And in this new way of living, neither is nicotine or the act of smoking.  And that's the key -- create a new life in which those urges are immaterial.  Thank you for expanding my understanding.

[renee95]

I have to say, this post hit home and was helpful. I had a slip recently. I am so happy that I have my computer back and am able to join the group again. It was a hard dark time to be without support of this group. My church group was helpful on this last difficulty and I went right back to my quit. Not even three hours passed before I was back on the wagon.

I did exactly what you say. I am an addict of nicotine it is my go to. Just like you say, not other things they just are not even a thought in my head. If I could pick one I would choose excercise and housecleaning, wouldn't that be nice. LOL. I am grateful to be BACK

[OxfordComa]

Love this!