I realized that use smoking asa crutch as I was processing problems stress and any confusing or hard interpersonal relationship. I lit up. It gave me time to think. I am actually so happy to relaize that I made it through some harsh emotional stuff yesterday and this morning (famiy drama) without smoking!
But it hit me how those memory banks of mine were pushing me to reach for a lighter to pay with, a smoke, somethig.
The addiction is the most insidious evil thing I have ever encountered. And I am D-O-N-E being a tool for tobacco advertising and being a damned drug addict!
NEVER AGAIN! And somehow, this new backbone of mine is translating into me standing up for myself in some other areas.... I think that one of the scariest byproduct of smoking is the way it trains you to stuff yourself with nicotine and other poisons instead of dealing with life as it comes.
