So I got derailed before... but I am working on Day 2. Obsessive thoughts can be a bit difficult to manoever right now, but they're doable. Having to relearn teaching my son, stress in general, cooking, mornings... all without a cigarette. Ya know, I was ready but not willing to do the work the last time. I had to be willing. I prayed for willingness and I got it. I was convicted that I was in sin- remember how I said "Thou Shalt Not Kill" is a commandment and not a suggestion? That played over and over in my head as I was smoking. I hurt Jesus every time I lit up. I was a hypocrite. I had given up my smobriety for what??? To be enslaved. To be in spiritual rebellion. To come to the conclusion I was doing nothing FOR myself but so much TO myself. I effectively ruined my own smoking- Thank God!!! So I'm here. Ready. WILLING to do the work. Able. Yes I believe this is doable... and I am doing it. Peace and love to all of you.
