On the Eve of FIVE years

[elims-09-14-13]

Hello!

I don't come here very often anymore. It's not that I don't miss you all! 

Life goes on - and life ends. Many of you know that I lost my Mother to COPD on July 4, 2016. I lost my Aunt to lung cancer April 19, 2017. I've had severe issues with my son since 2009(kicked out of school, mental health care needs not being met, Social services involvement, inadequate residential mental health care, ran away from group home, kicked out of Job Corps), and he turned 18 this year and moved out for good...which is good and bad. 

I've had two major car accidents in the last two years, totaled both cars and left me with chronic back pain and Post Concussive Syndrome.

This year I lost my Dad. April 27, 2018. Totally unexpected, and the kids and I were the ones to find him passed away on the floor of his bedroom. I talked to my Dad every day. He was the only person I could just dump on and have no judgement or repercussions. And he's gone. 

It's been TOUGH. 

My oldest brother and I took care of the estate and got the house we grew up in, the house our parents had for almost 50 years, sold in less that 2 months after Dad passed. My cousins also had to sell the house their parents lived in for almost 50 years - and which two of them had moved back into after Uncle Bob died in 2009.This year, for the first time in our lives, we have no family home to go to for the Holidays.

T.O.U.G.H.

And through it all - I still haven't quit my quit. 

I can tell you that if you asked me 5 years ago if I would still be quit today, I probably would have said no. And yet, here I am. 

You can do it too. Yes - YOU. The one reading this thinking, "This is hard. I'm not sure." I had many quits and relapses over probably a decade or more before I really stopped smoking forever. This place is a great resource and can be a lifesaver when you are triggered.

As someone way wiser than me here said - you have to want to quit more than you want to smoke. And then remember that smoking never did, and never will, make anything better.

Hang in there!

~Elims Lisa 9/14/13

[stAn3]

Thanks for sharing!

[YoungAtHeart]

I am so sorry to hear of all you have been through.  I am also PROUD of you for understanding and accepting that smoking would not have made any of it any easier.

I am wishing that the rest of 2018 will be a more joyous time for you and your family.

We will leave a light on for you so you can find your way back to check in with us when you can.

Nancy

[Mandolinrain]

BEAUTIFUL YEARS SMOKE FREE

CONGRATS!!!!

I ditto Nancys comment, your sure have had the 'Mother Load' dumped on you.

It goes to show that it is possible to get through life challenges and still not smoke. It is true freedom and you are proof.

Thank you for stopping in and sharing that and know that we are ALL still here for you . Think of us as your extended family and when your get to feeling alone or down, please stop by anytime to visit....even on Holidays. 

[JonesCarpeDiem]

Hugs and big congratulations.

I'm sorry for all the loss and frustration.

If you need a listening ear I'm here.

[MarilynH]

I'm so sorry for everything you've been through and still going through with pain from the car accidents BUT I'm so happy to be able to congratulate you on your four precious Smokefree years and counting WTG ,you are a true inspiration to all of us thank you so much for sharing .elims-09-14-13

[Mike.n.Atlanta]

You may not have a family home to go to during the holidays but you do have family & that means more Lisa.

Congratulations on your 5 great smoke free years!

[Barbscloud]

Congratulations on 5 years.  Thanks for sharing your story to inspirer us new quitters.

[Giulia]

Life is tough, and you've had so many losses.  And finding your father on the floor, I can't even imagine the shock of that.  So very sorry.  And for your children.  But you have toughed it out and remained steadfast to your quit even so.  A great example of hanging in there  yourself.  Congrats on your five years.  

[indingrl]

GOOD JOB STAYING A NON SMOKER AND LIVING LIFE ON LIFES TERMS-SO SORRY FOR ALL YOUR LOSSES AND HEART LONGING FOR YOUR DAD AND SON AND FAMILY HOME. TAKE CARE OF YOU-LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU!

[Strudel]

This is a powerful message on how to keep a quit! I am so sorry for all of the losses in your life. But, you are so very right - smoking would make nothing better. 

Congratulations on 5 years!! Fantastic! 

[elvan]

I am so terribly sorry for all you have been through...I do hope that things settle down and that your son somehow can find his way. You have done everything anyone could have done and MORE, Lisa.  You have been an amazing mother and advocate for him. You have a beautiful five year old quit and I am so happy for you and proud of you.  Thank you for sharing your anniversary with us, I have missed you but certainly understand that you have had a great deal on your plate.  I am so sorry about the accidents and the resulting issues...you deserve a break, my friend.

Love and hugs,

Ellen

[elims-09-14-13]

I do miss you all. My supportive, helpful quit family!