Greetings,
I have been an active smoker since the age of 12 and will celebrate my 58th birthday in January and not too happy about it at all. I found this site and thus far have been delighted with the compassion and kindness shown by other members. It is a comfort to know that there are others out there that can help. I have been looking at my triggers and by far the most toxic to me are other peoples beahviors/attitudes also tailgate drivers. I have zero tolerance for insensitvie self involved folk and because I encounter so many people in this little town--I work in the tourism industry--I can easily become frustrated and stressed. The area I live is most pristine and when I see the area and its' community members disrespected I simply melt down and smoke. Tuesday was my day off and had a most delightful day--at home working on paths for this winters' snowshoeing trails. I only smoked 3 cigarettes but on the following day I smoked like a chimney--an increase in traffic, disrespectful folk iin the grocery line, misbehaving children unatteded by there parents etc. I know I can not change others' behaviors but I just can't seem to get past why some folk would want to make life difficult for others--the ME, ME, ME--the because I can folk-- disturb me greatly. I have been told I'am a rather selfless person trying so hard to make the world a better place that I just can't relate to so many who do not seem to have the same attitude. I also have an extremely demanding mother who takes everything I do for her for granted. I will be trying hard to get this monkey off my back--the only bad vice I now carry around. It is hard to do things just for me. My quit date is the 14th of October--on the 15th of October I have made an appointment with my accupunturist to have my ears tagged. So at least I feel I'am moving in the right direction. I have not had so many nuts, carrots, celery or apples in the house for a very long time. Whew--I hope this works--I want to live for a long time and coming from a fellow who has dealt with major depression for most of his life that is saying something. Thanks to one and all who will be willing to support me in this rather trying endeavor. Raven
