Need advice breaking a long time trigger.

[quitordie3]

                I have been smoking 40 years mostly cowboy killers last few years rolling my own because of cost.    I have a quit date of Dec 5^th.  I have attempted to quit in the past about times 6 times:  once for a year when I was really young 12 and had my father standing in my face like a drill sergeant telling me “you will not spend one penny I give you for butts” (put a little of the fear of God in me and no he was not abusive) and few times many years later for 1 week, 2 weeks and 4 ½ months.

                Here’s my question.  About 15 years ago I quit for 4 ½ months I was so close with Wellbutrin.  I really can quit easily just have a problem staying quit.  After about 4 months my head kept telling me “You need a cigarette” “You need a cigarette” “You need a cigarette” literally more than 100 times a day. 

                I went to meet my internet girlfriend for the first time (800 miles away DUH and yes was stupid enough to drive that ONCE) we got engaged a few months later.  On that 15 hour trip home I was in an emotional downer because I had to leave her and thinking ”you need a cigarette” over and over and I broke down and started smoking again.

                Any clue how to stop this trigger?  I know the girlfriend made it worse but I was still thinking “You need a cigarette” “You need a cigarette” “You need a cigarette”.

                                                                Thank You

                                                                Quit or Die

[froguelady]

That "you need a cigarette" isn't what I consider a trigger, it is the nicotine addict inside of you because it wants to be fed. How much reading have you done about nicotine addiction?  The key to a forever quit is educating yourself about the power nicotine has on your body but also on your mindset.  Find a member named  jonescarp aka dale as he has much info and links on his page.  You can quit and I smoked over 50 years and have been smoke free for 3 years and 8 months. You will find great help and support here but you are the one in control of your quit, the choices you make is for you only.  No one can quit for you.

[JonesCarpeDiem]

click on my cat Hoggie and take a few minutes to get quitting into perspective.

[YoungAtHeart]

Welcome to our community!

Your first order of business is to understand what is going on when you quit smoking.  We have hidden from our emotions behind a cloud of smoke for so long, we really don't know how to deal with them any other way.  There is a LOT you don't understand about nicotine addiction.  The better educated you become, the more likely you are to succeed.

The most important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read. Here is a link to a free PDF version of it:

http://media.wix.com/ugd/74fa87_2010cc5496521431188f905b7234a829.pdf

As well, read the sections on this site, and read the blogs, responses and pages of folks you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com and quitsmokingonline.com for the good information contained there. You should also do the tracking and separation exercises suggested on this site

After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. But – any method that you think will work well for you will be best for you.

The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand. If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different.

You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.  Don't let that smoking thought rattle around your head alone.  Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

Nancy

[Sootie]

May I add that you also need to do a little mental reinforcing....you actually do not "want" a cigarette. Oh---I know you think you do....we all did. What you want is for your body to stop the craving for nicotine. What you want is to develop the new normal that you will develop once you are quit which doesn't ever "want" a cigarette. None of us want to light something smelly that we have to pay a lot of money for and which is socially unacceptable in so many places now. 

Please do the readings....they will give you a new insight into the addiction and how to react to different situations.

Stay Strong.

[Strudel]

Welcome! Please do the reading Nancy gave you - learning about this addiction is so important. I also smoked for 40 years - I quit over 4 years ago! The difference - doing the reading and getting the support offered here! Stick around! 

[quitordie3]

Thanks for the advice folks.  I am in a Harford County Maryland Smoking Cessations class weekly for 6 weeks and an receiving lots of written info about how it affects your body, mind and in class demonstrations like the a years’ worth of tar looks like in a jar ewww.

I’m willing to read more and have looked at what you suggested and will continue to read and have printed Allen Cars book.

I just had a very strong urge (addiction) that would not seem to let my mind have a minute’s peace.  I can be strong for long periods but not forever and was just hunting for suggestions.

Happy Thanks Giving

Thanks

Quit or Die

[Julia_Amy]

I was a serial quitter... well 3 times. Like you, I quit for longer periods of time. I quit for good by coming here everyday. I read and read and read blogs, older blogs, new blogs. I listened as people succeeded and I listened as people failed. I saw the deep roots of addiction in myself finally. It's like weeding my friend. If your cut the weed, it WILL grow back. Got to get to the root. That takes more work and patience. One more thing; I came and come here and ask for help at the first whiff of weakness. I hope you come and gather the tools to win over this addiction... permanently.