7 days since I quit. I have made it through Hell Week, woohoo.
Last night felt like my first real test. My husband didn’t end up smoking on Friday night, so that was easy. But last night he asked me what my plans were and said he wanted to have a drink, which I knew meant he would be smoking. I went through a few moments of feeling bored and lonely and irritable and left out and actually teared up a little because I was feeling so emotional. I showed him the letter I have found on here to help explain to family members the emotional rollercoaster we go through when quitting. I actually never had a real craving though where I really wanted a cigarette—just some sadness. I took a nicotine lozenge and stayed inside while he went out and texted with a family member for a while about something unrelated and that got my mind off of it. Then I lit a candle and played some music did some self massage to try to give myself some relaxation and pleasure without the damn cigarettes. It worked!
Yesterday I noticed the smell of stale smoke on a friend when they sat next to me and in the bathroom after my husband had been in there after smoking outside. It smelled disgusting to me—I never used to notice it and I can’t believe I used to go around smelling like that.
This morning I woke up feeling victorious because I got through a particular situation without smoking that I haven’t been able to for many months. I got good rest and my mouth doesn’t taste like an ashtray. My lungs don’t hurt and I don’t have a cough or slight headache or feel “hungover” from smoking the night before.
I feel that I really want to be doing this (quitting) this time and that is making all the difference. It has also been very helpful to just focus on the current day, and really take this one day at a time as some of you had suggested. Thinking about “forever” can feel too overwhelming right now. Yesterday I told myself I only had to get through two hours without smoking before it would be time to go to bed and that seemed so much more manageable than “I can never do this again.”
