In my last blog I wrote of the quandry of being dealt a trauma right before my quit date and dealing with a cross country move I'll make in a week and a half (I'm in the midst of packing, getting rid of all furniture etc.) In the post the problem was this; my quit date was the 7th of Aug (despite Ex's advice in my quit plan of the major life event change)- which I felt I could handle since I've thought so much about quitting and am frankly tired of being this person who smokes. THen last week a traumatic and unexpected event happened which threw me off for a week. I am working my way back to the mindset I had before, which was I can do this despite the life change of moving across country. Realizations 1) One thing I could handle, the two things I couldn't- so I have to forgive my weakness and move on- 2) THe trauma was a one time thing and its over and won't happen again- I wrote about it in my journal, have dealt with it as best I can, and even if I don't feel total closure I am close to feeling so. 3) I want to maximize my chances of success and yet not make excuses.
With these three realizations my plan is this- EX recommended I wait until Oct 1 to quit due to the life change. But I don't want to wait that long. Aug 31 may be hasty, but I will keep to it and between now and then work the separation excercises as hard as I can and smoke as little as possible. The mindset I had before about quitting in the midst of a life change like moving across country, leaving a job, ect. was that I will be very busy, for many days I will be in my car (where I've never smoked), and its a disruption of my routine (I only smoke at home for the past two years anyway), not at work. When I arrive at my destination (a few days before the 31) I will assess the decision about the 31st and delay no longer than mid Sept (EX recommended October 1st). I realize this is a really strange way to go about it. But that's what I decided.
Stay strong everyone. I am praying for you all and wishing you strength and peace. Thank you to all of you who posted to my previous blog.
