Today is day 5! WOW!!! I remember thinking a year ago, that quitting was going to be so hard, and that the withdrawal was the thing that was holding me back - going through the withdrawal. I had tried on several occasions, and learned something from each attempt. This time, I realized I did not want to feel the pain, be uncomfortable, or suffer with that nagging feeling known as a craving.
Then, I realized that I was feeling the pain, I was uncomfortable, and was dealing with that nagging craving feeling anyway!!!!!! So - just get it done, just do it. No excuses. It took me a couple of attempts this year, but I made it. YEAH! I had to focus on the idea that nicotine produced chemical changes in my brain, and that after the first 3 days, the drug would be out of my system, and that what was left for the most part, was the habit or social/emotional addiction. I planned it out very carefully - get rid of the chemicals, and deal with each habit or social piece.
I started cutting back at work, not smoking with the 'buds'. I changed my smoking setting. I switched cigarettes to the brand that is pure tobacco - no chemicals. I started meditating, and focusing on the idea that if I really wanted to quit, I would.
I was tired of being jerked around by my addiction, and recently, was being woke up at night, sometimes a few times at night, to satisfy that addiction. I had to go out to the store first thing in the morning, or late at night to buy them. I stayed away from friends and family because I was smoking cigarettes, not wanting to get close to them because I smelled like cigarettes. Not wanting to be a 'bad' example for my grandkids, and boy do they watch every move you make.
I also was getting scared, because I noticed tightness in my lungs and wheezing after puffing on a butt, and when I caught a cold, I really got sick, and missed several days from work each time. I watched my Dad die from lung cancer, saw my brother, and a brother-in-law die before their time of heart attacks. I have high cholesterol and high triglycerides which is made worse by smoking. I also have heart rhythm problems, which are also made worse by smoking.
So - I am choosing life over my addiction to cigarettes. I love my life, and I love my Freedom!
