You are so right. It will not help. I bet you feel pretty good about that week. Think about how awesome a week is 🙂 you have come this far. Focus on how awesome you are.
I know relationships are hard. Do you have a non-smoker friend you can meet for coffee or meet for a walk? Can you put some of your fav tunes on and dance around your house? Can you find a novel you haven't read and sit down and read? Are you a shopper, can you go to a mall and window shop? ANYTHING. You can do anything. You can go anywhere and not have to worry about having to sneak out for a smoke.
That smoke won't help the situation. It will only make you feel like crap that you blew your quit. But, if you hold on.... you will feel proud and strong! You can do this.
Cigs are definately not company, they are the enemy! It's not going to fix the relationship, or help you in the slightest! Trust yourself and everyone here. We are you friend and will do whatever we can!
Smoking was the old way of dealing with emotions. This is where you make that decision to handle it differently. This is where you take charge of your life.
First of all, don't go to the store, don't go near anyplace that sells or has cigarettes. Keep yourself away from all that.
Keep busy. Go take a walk if weather permits. Find a good book to read or just stay here on EX and read the blogs. Entertain yourself by doing a puzzle. Call a good friend. Do household chores to stay busy. Do anything, but don't smoke. Cigarettes are and never will be good company. They are not your friend. In fact, they will put you into isolation and depression. Don't let that happen. Stay here with us. We will be your friends. We will keep you company.
Hi, I really know how you are feeling right now. I am 6 days new to this. A couple of days ago I encountered a troubling conversation with my husband. I felt like I needed to smoke very badly, every ounce of my being wanted to. I was very angry and sad. Thank God, I didn't have any cigs or butts within reach. I took a deep breath, exhaled, went outside to work out with weights which got my aggression out. I came back in and calmly resumed the conversation holding onto my cinnamon stick and chewing the heck out of it. I got through it. Think about all the reasons why you are quitting. Stick to your guns about your quit. Hang in there. The emotions will pass. Don't let the Nicodemon whisper lies in your head. Picture yourself slaying him. I believe in you - you can do this! : )
SO SORRY you are having a hard time! Relationships are hard...no need to hurt yourself over it! As a non-smoker your self esteem grows every day and begins to illuminate your soul in beautiful ways...you will be able to better handle the ups & downs emotionally and think more clearly...hang in there no matter what because as we say here "YOU are worth SO MUCH MORE than a cigarette" xo
See? You've got plenty of company HERE! And we won't poison your lungs and make you cough, and shorten your life, and cost you LOTS of money.
If you aren't up for any of the things Scheidl suggested - you can always scream into a pillow! Or throw one across the room! Take slow, deep breaths while raising and lowering your arms, slower and alower and slower...Do a few jumping jacks....Call a friend. Read ALL the blogs and responses from the last 24 hours!
Just distract yourself for a bit.......don't give in! You will feel doubly awful, I promise you.
As you've seen in the last few minutes, you've got lots and lots of company right here!
NO ONE is worth losing your quit over. Quitting is the best thing you can do for yourself, take charge and show yourself you are WORTH IT. When life weighs us down, it helps to remember that quitting may be the one positive thing to cling to!
I am so proud of you for quitting and I don't even really know you but I do sympothsize with you relationship problems can be stressful but please don't lose your quit over it , you have so much to gain from quitting and your worth it try to breathe deep and talk positive to yourself idk what the trouble is but I've lived through some pretty toxic relationships myself and looking back my only regret was waiting so long to love myself enough to walk away ❤️ you can do this and it will get easier and easier
When we finally get around to stop poisoning ourselves with those nasty cigarettes, it starts to open our eyes to realize that we are worth so much more than we ever knew.
Oh and just an after thought positive distractions can be good you've quit at least a week so that's some money saved ....I'm all for a little retail therapy or a nice pedicure feels awsome : )
I am sorry about your relationship. But you and I both know that cigs are not going to fix your relationship, but they are a means of helping cope. Come here and talk and vent to your fellow ex-smokers. Don't let your partner win by making you feel so upset to go back to smoking. Try journaling, going for a walk, blogging, playing an online game, clearning, starting a mini project anyhting to distract yourself. I recently went back to playing yoshi story and will keep going till i beat the game over and over. It distracts me for a few hours. If you do crack or break and go buy a pack, that cig may make you feel calm for a few minutes but it won't fix your relationship, and after that first one is gone you'll be wanting another soon after. And the guilt you feel from breaking your goal will just make you feel worse.
Stay strong try to find another ways to relax. I know it is easier said than done. Once if you address those relationship issues you may feel less stressed and less apt to want to smoke.
Message me privatley if you do need to talk more in detail.
I hope by now you have talked yourself right our of making that mistake to smoke again. It just ain't worth it, not, not, not. Be strong, and enjoy your new lifestyle smokefree!!!
I am going thru similar stuff. I am at 13 days clean of the nicotine I just got divorced final in April- Had started up with another woman as I was finalizing divorce- She has been all over the place with things- She was first frustrated that i was married- and i was a smoker
Now Im divorced- and a non smoker- she only wants to be friends - we broke up until divorce was final- got back together a few times- bottom line - it has just been drama dealing with this relationship- sometimes we just have to drop back and punt! Accomplishing getting off the nicotine is truly the best thing we can do for ourselves- it needs to come before anything else for a good while- the cigs will kill us- it is an important undertaking getting off nicotine.
My Dad ( God rest his should) said to me many years ago- "if someone is causing you constant heartburn- probably good to let them go" not poetic but probably a good bit of truth in that. I am in the same boat- in love with someone that doesn't want the same things - but still wants me around- its some kind of weird game I am tired of.
Just thought I give you a head up. This original post was 7 years ago, so I don't know if you'll receive a response. Didn't want you to feel like you're being ignored.
Barb
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