Day four... Had news this morning that someone i worked with, talked to, laughed with, hung out with, smoked with, vented to died Saturday. Haven't talked to him in over a year. Don't know the what, why, where, whatever. WOW. Shocker way to start the day. Reached immediately for where my cigarettes used to live (right next to my hand!) and THEY DON'T LIVE THERE ANYMORE! Thank God, or i'd be smoking. I'm a little freaked out. Didn't sleep real well last night. Seemed like i was awake more than asleep. Still i layed there and my eyes were closed most of the time and i don't feel like i didn't rest at all. Holy cow. Premonition? Don't know. Nicotine withdrawl? Maybe. Maybe not. Nicotine should be out of my system now, right? Haven't smoked. Friday, Sat, Sun and so far today. Are the tears because of the death or because i'm not smoking or because of the withdrawl? WHO KNOWS??? Staying strong for me! Sheryl
