Day 44

[whooonk]

So close to day 50. One of the major things that has seemed to change is that I am starting to look at days by 5 or 10 instead of the HOURS that I was looking at it. The cravings are still GUT PUNCHING out of nowhere cravings but they are getting to be less often and more of a specific trigger that I didn't even think about being a trigger. Like the other day when I took the old Ford Ranger into Lowes to pick up some outdoor project stuff. I used to smoke 2 cigarettes on the way there and 2 cigarettes on the way back. I haven't been in that old Ranger since before I quit cause I don't hardly drive it but man I tell you what! Soon as I picked up the keys from the key rack I got punched in the sternum so heard by a craving it almost made me stop breathing!! But I knew what it was, identified it as such, and forced myself to move on. I enjoyed the day and the outdoor project as much as ever and another two days have ticked by since then. I am starting to feel more positive and the bouts of depression, sadness, and loss I felt at the beginning is all but gone (comes back sometimes though I will admit). Thanks everyone who has been fallowing and encouraging.