This is getting easier; however, Saturdays are still tough. The "just one" demon likes to wake up on Saturday, so since this has become a pattern, I think it is situational. As long as I don't give in to him, I'm fine. I usually let the urge pass. I have to relearn my Saturday behavior and remember why I quit. I also fix a pot of tea (iced tea last Saturday) and sip it all day. It makes me feel like I am doing something.
The week days are much easier. I spent some time reflecting last weekend. I used to wake up between 12 and 2 am. I couldn't go back to sleep unless I went outside to smoke. Sometimes, I would wake up 3 times a night to smoke. First thing in the morning, I would be outside smoking again. I am so happy to not have that monkey on my back.
My "Smoke Free" app says that I've save $175. $175!!!!! That's like getting a raise. The amount of money I spent on smoking continues to shock me.
I think I've saved more than $175 because I rarely just bought a pack. I'd get a drink or a snack or coffee and a pack. I went into my local 7-11 yesterday and the clerk asked, "Where you been?"
This is usually when I mess up and give into the demon. I'm confident about not smoking and convinced myself that I could handle "just one." The truth is, "I am one cigarette away from being a smoker again." That is the truth!
