Had another "Smokemare" last night. They are super vivid and real! It's absolutely incredible. I haven't been dreaming much lately but these “Smokemares” are out of this world realistic. So much so that I actually was 10 seconds from going and getting the smokes that I dreamed I had. I have a “smoking” jacket that I used to keep my smokes in and I got out of bed this morning with the understanding I had blew it and there was a pack in my coat from the night before. Same thing almost as the last time on day 10. It's crazy! It hit me really hard on day 10 and I had a really hard time dealing with it. Today I am having a better time of it but it was still a little tough when I woke up thinking that I had blown my quit after almost 20 days! I was really bummed with myself for doing that. I was pretty glad when I realized it was only a dream.
On a side note, as I am typing this blog post out I just realized I am not far from 20 days! That's another tick in the double digit column! How incredible is that!!!??? I am pretty stoked. Even though the feelings and cravings are still there and I still have to fight them there is a layer of excitement over those feelings and cravings.
It's exciting!
