Cravings return

[stAn3]

I have been smoke-free since July 30, 2018. It has been a long time since I had cravings. I’m usually not triggered at all. Recently I relapsed on Mtn Dew. I quit drinking it because I’m pre diabetic and it gives me kidney stones. When I drink caffeinated beverages, I get dehydrated. I get dry mouth. Dry mouth has always been a trigger for me. I also get anxious and depressed, which are triggers.

I have been working on my diet to lose weight for about a year, no results. I got discouraged and relapsed into addictive eating habits (drinking Mtn Dew and eating Domino’s pizza everyday). I have always been an addictive eater. This behavior is not new but it doesn’t feel the same because I went so long eating better. I joined a 12-step program for addictive eating because I am desperate to get back to where I was a few weeks ago with my exercise and diet. I feel trapped. I can’t continue my old eating routine without feeling shame and anxiety and wanting to smoke. I am scared and sad when I think of giving up addictive eating. I’m also scared that nothing will work because I’ve tried everything I know for the past year and still haven’t gotten to a healthy diet or lost a single pound.

I started going to the 12-step meetings a week ago but I haven’t shared. I got phone numbers of experienced group members but I haven’t call any of them. I’m scared to pull the trigger and actually commit to the food program.

Although I have over 3 years smoke-free, I’ve relapsed countless times into smoking. I haven’t been participating in this community recently, but I know that I will get help if I come back and put some effort into my quit. I know I need to post before I smoke. Thanks for reading.

[YoungAtHeart]

@JonesCarpeDiem likes to say:  "If you are quitting smoking and you are still smoking, you are doing it wrong."

I'm confused, though.  You say "I have over 3 years smoke free, I've relapsed countless times into smoking."  Were the relapses during the three years?  If so, you need to accept that every lapse takes your brain sensors back to Day One of your quit.  The sensors don't know (or care) how much time you have remained smoke free.  They only know that they got their hit, and they want ANOTHER!

I'm sorry I am not able to help with your other needed lifestyle changes. It seems obvious to me that you aren't yet committed to changing if you can't seem to motivate yourself to get started.  Sometimes the most difficult step is the first.  What is the harm in doing that?  

It's good to see you!  I hope you continue on the path to a healthier, Best of You!!

Nancy

[Kimshine]

Hi @stAn3  There are lots of things going on in your post. You're obviously spiraling out of control with your eating, so I would  recommend using those phone numbers you received at your program and getting honest with yourself and someone that can help you gain control. 

As for smoking, you mentioned you have been smoke free for 3 years but you have relapsed countless times in the 3 years? If we're smoking, we're not quit. Relapses happen and it's ok. We can help you get back on a no smoking track if that is what your wish is. 

Getting honest about smoking and over eating is going to be  of utmost importance in both. It doesn't make sense that you have been on a reduction program for a year and not lost a single pound. Are you being true to the lifestyle change? Honesty and accountability are paramount. 

We can help you with your smoking  cessation here if you choose. I don't want to sound rude and this may sound that way to you or others but if you're handling your eating/diet program the way you're handling  your smoking cessation program then I can see where therein may lie the problem.

We can support you! Make a plan and tell us what it is. It might be best to start  with one situation at a time or else dive in and do all of it. 

There will be elders to come along  and offer some advice. My best advice, is to get honest because that seems like a great place to start!

Best wishes!

[Cousin-Itt]

 @stAn3 you know the problem and you know what to do. You need to take that next step until then nothing will change.  Use the meetings, use the numbers and do what you need to do

This has been on my refrigerator for years.  It has helped me and my family

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”

― Frank Herbert, Dune

Trust in your Higher Power

[sweetplt]

I am so sorry about your food addiction…I am glad you joined a group to get help @stAn3 … that has got to be awful…I wish I could help you out…

Please don’t smoke…then you will have to work on two addictions….you really worked hard for your quit Stan….focus on the food addiction and getting healthier…don’t let smoking even an option….please come here more often and let us know how you are doing….~ Colleen 1144 DOF 

[Barbscloud]

Hi @stAn3 Glad you stopped by when you felt you needed some support.   Maintaining three years of your quit is a fabulous accomplishment so don't sell yourself short.  I've battled my weight my entire life, so I understand how frustrating it can be.  It can be hard for other's to understand how defeating it can feel if they've never been in that position.  It's the same as non-smoker's not understand how hard it is to quit smoking.  Smoking typically does help to keep our weight down, so it can be tempting to think about smoking again.  It can be a struggle for some of us.

Since you said you've been working on your diet for a year, are there any medical conditions or medications  that may be at play?   I developed hypothyroidism when I quit and the weight has not come off. 

Stay close now.  Relapsing is not an option.

Barb

[tracy0924]

Hi @stAn3 . It sounds like you have a couple of issues going on right now. I’m not sure if you meant that you relapsed during the three years of non-smoking or if that was before this current three-year period. As said above, every time you relapse and start over you have to start the clock ticking again from day one. I hope for your sake that it has been a full three years since you have quit, and that with support from the site we can help you keep from starting again. You really don’t want to go down that road of starting from day one again.

On the over eating addiction, that is a separate issue and I think that you should pursue following your contacts as soon as possible to help you with that issue. That also can be done! I’ve been on a diet for the last 6 to 8 months and I have lost 40+ pounds after being overweight for most of my adult life. I still have a little ways to go (I didn’t see much progress over the holidays) , but I am really feeling good about myself again. I joined a program through my medical group with meetings for eight weeks in addition to ongoing doctor supervised medication. The program has been a lifesaver. Once you get involved with your group and start losing some actual weight you are going to feel much better about yourself.

Let us know how we can help to support you So that you do not start smoking again. But yes, the real person in charge here is you! You need to want this! I hope to hear more from you soon!🤗

Tracy 119DOF

[Christine13]

Hi @stAn3 

I get your post, you are 3 years quit, and are having some trouble right now, so hooray for coming back to where we can support you, and you can support others.

I once had both a drinking and smoking addiction.

The way out is a lot of hard work.  I am not a skinny-mini either.

Dieting is tough but you can do it.  Weight Watchers is a great way of eating if you want to loose weight healthily  If you binge eating everyday on pizza, you won't loose weight.  I think it's emotional overeating.  Eating and emotions go hand in hand.

Go out and find a good healthy diet plan, or ask your doctor for help.

I wish you all the best.

Christine

[stAn3]

I have not smoked since July 30, 2018, but this is not my first time quitting. I’ve learned from previous quit attempts that even after years of not smoking, the cravings can return and lead to relapse if not addressed. I hope that clears up any confusion about my quit date.

I am still smoke-free. I have taken action on my compulsive overeating. I am preparing to quit my addictive food behaviors. I’m not freaking out about it today.

[Barbscloud]

@stAn3 I understood that you were still smoke-free.  Big congrats.

Barb

[Kimshine]

@stAn3  Thanks for clearing up the confusion. I didn't understand. My apologies for the misunderstanding.

Great for you for remaining smoke free during this difficult time and coming here  for support is exactly what you're supposed to do instead of smoking. 

You're almost 4 years quit and you know you can overcome anything without smoking and we can help you with that. Smoking won't change anything except for you'll have the addiction to overcome again. 

You can and will get your eating under control. You will use the same grit that you have used to remain nicotine free during tough times and I will support you with that too. It may be a non smoking site but we can encourage through many situations.

I'm happy that you're calm today because freaking out doesn't help anyway. 

Good for you and reach out if you need help or encouragement.