EX Community

Anonymous · ‎03-19-2021

Change is hard , it's frustrating , overwhelming , did I say frustrating ? Others ideas of functionality are different than my idea of functionality . Simplicity different than my sense of simplicity . I will learn .

Breathe , ok I'm breathing . Smoking not included . I will learn this site as we've done others before and it will grow on me and I will like it . I will take one day at a time and become orientated to my new surroundings . It will get easier . I will get better at it.

I don't know about others but my head hurts and my eyes feel cross eyed trying to read and navigate the site yet and I can't be on long before I'm exhausted .

At this point I guess I'm still trying to figure out where I am and how best I can help newbies in the simplest way on what feels to me a complicated site . No offense , it's not the crew building it ,or the site , it's me . I find the older I get the simpler things need to be ..not just tech wise but with everything .

So for now keeping it simple to me will be blogging , but I must do something about whatever it is making my head spin and stomach churn while even writing this .

Newcomers , friends :

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Newcomers , friends , if you are still reading this , I'd just like to share my day . Taxes , no smoking , other paperwork frustration , no smoking , distanced walked with and hopefully supported my quit bud who was diagnosed today with lung cancer . Neither of us thought about smoking , just how much we hated it and how glad we quit when we did , but not soon enough . Took two long walks , no smoking . More frustrating paperwork , no smoking . Couldn't cope with the frustration , more walking , no smoking .

Only by "doing this quit " by not smoking and choosing nope through all circumstances and only by taking one day at a time and handling every day one day at a time has "not smoking" become so easy . To think of my future not smoking in the beginning was hard and it even seemed sad to loose my 25 pack best friends . It will likely be hard for you too but you can do it and you must . Cancer is real .

Quitting wasn't as hard as hearing my friend tell me of her diagnosis today or what she will have yet to face . Quitting is easy compared to that. I know she too would want you stop playing with the time you have ... and just do it . Stop smoking , start your quit and don't look back .

Now I have said in the past I don't want to scare people into quitting but I think we really need to face reality folks . We can't take risks hoping the one cigarette we relapse with , won't be the one . We all ( myself included ) need to stay quit . We can stay quit . We have each other to bear the load . Reach out whenever you feel like giving in . We are there for you as you will be for us .

My friend is strong , she beat cancer once, I know she can do it again .

Christine13 · ‎03-19-2021

I'm so very sorry to hear about your friend Maki. I know you will stay strong and help her through this.

Novapeever · ‎03-20-2021

I am very sorry to hear about your friend however we must face the reality that cancer is hard to deal with I have Prostate cancer and vaping isn’t helping with my treatment I am better but I know that stopping vaping will help with treatment

WhispersQSMB · ‎03-20-2021

I'm so sorry, when my mother got diagnosed first with emphysema and down the road lung cancer it was devastating news for us. I'm so sorry @Anonymous

"Now I have said in the past I don't want to scare people into quitting but I think we really need to face reality folks . We can't take risks hoping the one cigarette we relapse with , won't be the one . We all ( myself included ) need to stay quit . We can stay quit . We have each other to bear the load . Reach out whenever you feel like giving in . We are there for you as you will be for us ."

As far as scaring people, my mother told me " Look what smoking did to me, don't wait like i did and quit when you have to, quit because you want to". The ending is bad, it was the scare i needed to quit for good

Anonymous · ‎03-20-2021

Thanks everyone . Right now I just want to be of support to her any way I can , listening , quiet whatever it takes again . She's always been so much support in my quit. We made a pact with each other not to smoke and we've both kept that close to ten years .

Novapeever , I'm sorry to hear you have thIs . My brother last year had this scare . I'm very glad to hear you are quitting vaping . Keep looking forward , one day at a time . Thanks for sharing your message . Stoping smoking helps recovery definitely .

MarilynH · ‎03-20-2021

{{{{{{{{{{Huge caring hug coming your way Maki 💝}}}}}}}}}}}

Bonnie · ‎03-20-2021

I'm sorry to read about your friend, Maki. I wish my friend would read your blog post. She told me last week that she has no intention of quitting smoking. Such a sad thing. She beat cancer once, too, but to care so little about yourself to not even try to quit...her doctor told her a few years ago that she was slowly killing herself and my friend was insulted. Insulted by the truth. That's what addiction does...robs you of the truth...

I'm getting my feet wet on this site...so very grateful for EX and for EXers like you. Thank you for being here, Maki, and I'm sure you will be there for your friend, too.

Anonymous · ‎03-20-2021

As we know @Bonnie @ it's only from our most inner being that we can quit but it all starts with facing denial . For many of us it took the last straw and unfortunately there are some who never will come to terms with losing their best friends in a pack .

I really do hope your friend will talk to you in trust and truth how she feels and find a purpose to quit . You are a very good purpose to quit . Friends care .

Maybe if she knows she won't be judged she may find her way to Ex community just to read , no commitment . We know it's on quitters terms not ours .mWe are pretty good folks and not too intimidating . Pretty cool , pretty fun . We do understand . We understand how scary the thought of quitting can be too , it takes your breath away like a panic attack t but oh once you get a taste of freedom and Learn the ropes to keep ya afloat ya just keep wanting more freedom .

Congrats Bonnie , I'm glad you are here too .

Maybe my friend might stop in one day . Now that would be cool .

Bonnie · ‎03-22-2021

@Anonymous thanks for your comments, Maki, and I'm grateful I found it! I like the view of the new platform better on my laptop :). It's one of those topics that is a "done deal"...she was the excuse I had for many a relapse, since we lived next door to each other and were smoking/coffee drinking buddies for decades...Her son-in-law and daughter quit for years and both started again...they're the only people I know who smoke, except for the two people who run the park where I live...I think it's attraction rather than promotion, like the 12-step motto, and if she doesn't want to quit, I don't see how she ever will. I did tell her about the new cancer screening guidelines today...she couldn't believe that it takes 15 years 'til you're "out of the woods"...