Oh my goodness... What a shame, I made it for 14 hours or so before I did it. I picked up a cig and smoked it. I felt ashamed and extremely light headed! Why? Well there are never any good excuses! My poor boyfriend was home and trying to help me have a calm day. He was supposed to go to work today but he didn't. Well, I started crying for no reason except frustration and he felt terrible there was nothing he could do for me. He went outside and got my cigs out of his man cave (I had told him to destroy them last night) and he brought them to me and told me just to smoke. He said he loved me no matter if I was a smoker or non smoker, he just wanted me to feel better. I should have said no but I didn't. So here I am... A failure for today. However, I am doing it again. I am on day 1 once again. I can't stop! I have communicated to him that the best thing he can do is support me and tell me NO! If I cry and he doesn't like it, he needs to leave the room or find something else to concentrate on.
I'm not done trying! I will defeat this stupid smoking habbit!!!
