Bad Night

[susieq17]

I have been doing so good but tonite is a bad nite.  My daughter -in-law called and said I not being a good grandma to my one and only. Makes me very sad. I forgot to send a valentine to him. I feel so bad. My Mother has dementia and I have M.S..  Been a very hard year.  I am so happy I'm not smoking but tonite if Icould find one in this house I would smoke it! I know it's good i'm not but can't sleep and would like to relax.

[b.white]

Awwww. Dont feel bad... You are doing the most and the best that can be asked of you. Please dont be stressed. It will be a better day. Just Tie a Knot in a Rope and Hold On!

[susieq17]

 Thanks! My Mom just got up - it's 4:30  and she got dressed.  She is ready for the day. I tried to tell her it's too early and  she started crying. It is so hard. I am so afraid she will leave the house when i am asleep. We have an alarrm system but she keeps setting off. so I can't set it any more. Hard to sleep when I'm not sure what she is going to do.

[Bonnie11.3.2009]

You have a lot going on with your Mom, I hope you can find resources to help....maybe your daughter in law would like to bring your grandchild over to visit while you go to the store or get your hair done?   Maybe she could get a pictue of what your life is like and help you more instead of berating you for being exhausted and forgetting to send a Valentine. 

Give yourself a pat on the back, NO MATTER WHAT, you're protecting your quit.  Smoking doesn't really relax us, we just get a hit of dopamine and are addicted all over again.  Take warm bath, make some hot tea, find another ritual to help you relax. Most of all, get some hlep with your Mom! 

[aztec]

write down a lits of things to do instead of smoke, I had 100 make it long, and make another list of why you wnat to quit, I had a picture of my family i laminated and carried around for a long time.

You don't want to die sturggling to breath, it sounds like you have enough helath isssues to deal with so don't cop out.

I'm sorry to hear about  your issue with your grand daughter, I'm sur eyou can make thing sright. Just pick ourself up and be a good example to her for Her life down the road, no matter how small she is you can not smoke and be an example to her, they see everything.

I'm glad you came on here to blog.

I would rather breathe than smoke, when you get that realization that smokeing stops breathing you will be stronger, I hope you adopt it now.

You dont' have to do that to yourelf anymore, cigarettes are not our friend,

you have literal grooves in your brain and you need to rewire yourself and you can with education and "doing" new things, hobbies, wlaking,e xerciseing, cleaning, reinforce the good stuff, vitamins, her bteas, good cooking, anything that will help you to distract the 3 mintue urges, you can do this.

You are in the right place, call 1-800 lungusa any time as many times as you need between 8 and 10 pm.  get on here and blog, but get active in your life, it will help your ms too.

figure out some exercises that you can do, I know you are probobly in pain but if you don't move you will not get those feel good brain chemicals that help you feel better and you will gain more wieght.

so watch your diet, make a furit and a vegtealbe platter, and munch away on that.

there are so many things for you to do but smoke, learn a new language , tons of stuff. you need to be resolved to quit and understand why you are,

write your good by e letter.

post it here for everyone to see.

Warm regards Aztec

[Yaya2.6.10]

Hooray for more than a month of the Quit.  At about this time I realized that it was easier to work thru stress without smoking than with.  We always thought it relaxed us, but the addiction puts us under constant stress.  I've been there with the sick parents and you need help.  I totally understand that you don't have the time or energy to find help, but you must.  Hugs and prayers for you from me.

[AutumnWoman]

Please don't let ANYBODY guilt you into smoking!  Valentine's Day is just one day of the year when it's socially acceptable (and expected) for people to show "love".  I'm sure you love your family every day of the year.  To me, there's nothing wrong with having a Valentine's Week or Month.  You could celebrate at a time that works for everybody.  Maybe your daughter-in-law could bring your grandchild over for a visit this weekend, give you a chance to be with your grandchild and maybe she could help out a bit with your mother.  That might be more helpful than a card.  IMHO

[babs13]

Hang in there SusieQ.  You've come too far, to be looking back!

Have you gotten any help from the Dept. of  Aging?  There are these nifty little devises that are like a GPS, in a bracelet or anklet form, might be useful to you.  Call in your resources, you should be able to find all kinds. 

Above all, take care of yourself.  Keep sickerettes away from you and your home. 

See you around the site!

[dawn4]

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.....................SusieQ!  don't you DARE let someone else define you or lay a guilt trip on you for  a simple oversight.  It's apparent that you are a great daughter and my guess is that you love your grandson "to the moon and back"!!!

I'm so glad that you didn't lose your quit over this!!!!