So, in the last two months, I have slipped three times. Three cigarettes. Each time, oh my word, I could feel the suffocation I was putting myself through. Coughed a lot, had the embarrassed feeling all around me, tongue was weird.
But then there are days when the thought of one doesn't even cross my mind. I would go to bed and just as I would fall asleep, I'd think: huh, I must be getting better at this.
Most days though, it's a passing thought. Today it's a little stronger, so I'm blogging about it. Because smoking is/was not the answer to the craving.
I don't know; my mind's all fuzzy. I know I have put some major milestones under my belt for my quit like my first long-distance travel, first major fight with partner, major life-changing news, first dealing with family without smoking -- but the hardest one to tackle is when I'm in this limbo space where there is a lack of clarity or direction; when I'm between two tasks and I'm bored. So filling up that time by writing this 🙂
