Its funny how a blank page can actually say so much. I am an author (among other things) and in the past I have sat and looked at a blank page and never really felt a sense of panic or anxiety. I'd simply light a cigarette, sit back and enjoy watching my money go up in smoke.
Now, I sit in front of a blank page and I'm forced to think. Forced to do something I hope will be constructive or at least entertaining. Not smoking has made me demand more of myself. No longer can I be lazy and fool myself by believeing having a cigarette was a positive act.
One of the most important aspects I've discovered is I'm not as smart or as strong as I once thought. I know people quit smoking totally on their own and I applaud them. Most of us just don't have that caliber of fortitude. But, we have an extended famliy ... our EX family and all of you have helped me more than you'll ever know.
Today marks day 92 without a cigarette. I would not have made to day 2 if it weren't for the help, encouragement and education I receive here. Everyone has warned me about "No Man's Land". That is the time up to the fourth month after quitting. While some days are really great and I don't think about having a smoke other days are filled with the desire. But, because of you I know what to expect and more importantly I know you have made it and I can too. Thank you.
Recently, I made the choice to add walking to my daily routine. I should have done it way before now. It also reminded me about my grandpa. My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 97 years old and we don't know where the hell he is.
Have a great day all. Thank you all of my extended family and to those just joining know the journey isn't east but folks here make it much more bearable.
