check out the tips on the website again! smoking doesn't make you feel better, or less tense, it in fact makes you more tense and you start withdrawing again! right now i am off meds so i am blaming that a lot, so one step to not feel soo depressed is to take your meds. also, i was in an outpt program that recommended the book 10 days to self-esteem i highly recommend it! it's a workbook and you have to do the work but it helps! also i learned that getting my feelings out either by talking to someone or journaling/blogging i feel better. and finally come here for support! i have seen nothing but supportive people since i joined this website! Good Luck and don't beat yourself up about smoking! there is nothing you can do about the past, only the future!!