It is positively THRILLING to be quit 9 years. And kind of mind blowing.
What can I tell you about my journey that hasn’t already been said here?
Not much. But - for one thing, there are no more unpleasant surprises. No more surprise cravings that take me off guard. Oh yes, I’ll still get a hankering for one at odd moments, but those hankerings don’t surprise me any more. I recognize them now as part of the journey. No big deal. They come quickly and go equally quickly. I don’t dwell on them and thus they don’t dwell in me.
Dale (Jonescarp) and I might argue for days about whether there’s a No Man’s Land or not. The term wasn’t in my brain vocabulary when I quit, so for me there was no “No Man’s Land.” To me it’s a made up place that’s helpful if you need it to be as a marker, as another stage in this journey to get through. When the high of success has dwindled, your excitement has ebbed and ongoing maintenance is wearing you thin. When you think you’ve suffered enough, paid your dues and it should be over - but it’s not. Was there a period of time several months in where I kept being smacked with random strong cravings - you bet. And for me that period went on past the designated day limit of “No Man’s Land.” But then I was a tough case! lol That may not be the case for you. I do know, from experience, that quits are most fragile at the three-month period. I’ve lost two at that stage and seen others do the same. And it took me far too many years after the previous failure to come back and achieve this current (what I assume is) lasting success. So if you are reading this and are in that No Man’s Land stage - be prepared, raise you conviction level and have safety measures in place. You MUST stay convicted. You’re either in this for the duration - or you’re heading for Relapse City.
I have to attribute my long-term success to several factors. One is this incredible, loving, community. I hope that if I ever got to a place (highly unlikely) where I was about to relinquish this cherished quit for that one stupid puff, that I would follow the precepts reiterated on this site day after day - to come here and yell for HELP before going to the Addiction Store. But the other factor in my longevity is having the sense to stay tuned in to this quit site. It’s a reminder from where I’ve come, how hard this freedom was to achieve, it’s fragility, and the incredible beauty of it.
I do know this - you can never take your quit for granted. I’ve seen too many members here who have come from very long-term quits (longer than mine right now) to begin another Day One. They have taught me to be ever mindful. I also know that I never stop learning about this addiction and I find joy in that learning. From the newbie, from the oldbie, from the new information gathered and disseminated, from the incredible compassion offered here.
I guess what I’d have to say bottom line is - take an avid interest in your quit. Always. Keep nourishing it. Continue to study it. It changes. And so will you. Beautifully. It truly is a magnificent journey. But you’ll only recognize that when you’ve had some serious time with it under your belt. So stick with it! For all of us. But especially for YOU!
