I am so proud that I've made it 365 days without nicotine. Sometimes I still can't believe that I don't smoke anymore, but its true. I am so grateful to have finally found the knowledge and strength to put this addiction behind me. I wasn't weak, like I thought all those years, I was addicted. Its not that I didn't care about my body and health, its that I was addicted. I didn't know how to break that cycle.
There are so many misconceptions out there about smoking and smokers and spending time here on EX really helped me to understand the whys of my smoking, so that I could break down those lies and reorganize my thoughts so that I could move forward to happiness without nicotine. I'm not saying my life is perfect. I still have tough days when stress is pushing down on me, but I have other ways to deal with it now, instead of smoking. In my opinion quitting smoking has to be about accountability. You have to hold yourself accountable. I am the only one in control of my smoking. No one else can make me smoke. I can blame others, but when I really look at the situation, I see that in the end its my choice. I see that as truth when it comes to smoking and lots of other situations. Its always going to be my choice what I do and how I feel. Other people can act however they choose and its my choice how to react or whether to react to them. I think this is a big part of becoming a grown up and I'm just glad I figured this out, even if I'm already 35 years old and should've been a grown up for a while now!
I am free and it feels so great to be able to concentrate now on what I can do, instead of what I shouldn't be doing! So here is a small sampling of things that I've been doing since I quit smoking last year...
I ran my first 5k road race.
I played my guitar and sang like crazy when I first quit smoking, and my playing and singing improved tremendously.
I started a band with a couple of older gents that I found on craigslist. We call ourselves Not So Fast and we just started doing open mics not long ago. We are doing one tomorrow!
I started meditating and I really enjoy that.
I took up reading tarot cards and have gotten an abundance of insights into my life.
I realized the health/happiness link and have started taking much better care of my body through exercise and nutrition.
I smile more because my teeth are MUCH whiter!
My husband and I have a lot more sex (not sure if this is connected and sorry if TMI, but its true).
I feel fully present in the moment because I'm not thinking ahead to getting my next nic fix.
I make time to take care of myself, because I know that I feel best when I eat/sleep/exercise properly and I take care of others better when I'm taken care of...
I am really excited to start year two of this smoke free journey. I know that one puff would put me back to square one, so I have borrowed Nyima's insurance policy...
my deal is, if I'm going to start smoking again, I can't bum one or even just go buy a pack...I have to buy a whole carton because I know that I cannot have just one and cartons cost big bucks here in the great state of Massachusetts! I don't think even the worst crave humanly possible could force me to pony up that kind of dough! The truth is, I have absolutely no intention of going back to the smoking life, but I am going to stay vigilant, because I know now how tricky this nicotine addiction stuff can be and I don't want to get caught out without a plan for how to tiptoe back to happiness. And for me now, happiness really is staying free of nicotine. Thank you my friends for supporting and helping to educate me. Without the insight
of all of you on this website I wouldn't have made it this far...I know that now. So thank you so much. Another thing that kept me on track is the daily pledge group, thank you pledgers, I love reading the pledges when I go on to make my daily pledge to stay free of nicotine. Here is a link if anyone would like to come on over and pledge to be free of nicotine for 24 hours...I know it helps me stay on track...
Thanks again for reading and remember that you are worth the discomfort you must go through to really get free of nicotine. Give it time, one day at a time...what you learn will help you grow in ways you didn't think were possible!
Cory 365 days free today!♥
