cancel
Showing results for 
Show  only  | Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Share your quitting journey

Hitting The Buttons

Storm.3.1.14
Member
2 13 7
  We’ve all heard the same wisecrack at one point or another  : “All you have to do is stop buying cigarettes!” (Really?! Eureka! The world’s deadliest addiction, solved with one click of a golden   CURE button. Hooray!)
   
  Well-meaning people with good intentions, I’m sure, but with near-sighted advice that hardly scratches the surface.
   
  So, let’s start scratching…
   
  When a newbie is working through the first day or first week or first month of their quit, “DON”T BUY THEM!” is an effective command that can work in a heat-of-the-moment pinch. It’s like pressing a red NO button in the mind. A buzzer squeals, and the newbie refuses to drive to the store for cigarettes. Bam! (It’s really quite Pavlovian.)
   
  And, “don’t buy ‘em” works… for the moment. But, it ain’t a long-term fix. Never was.
   
  At some point, quitting cigarettes stops being about not buying cigarettes. It stops being about the purchase of the cigarette, and it starts being about the   use of the cigarette. The   act of smoking. The  habitual compulsion to inhale the   drug. At some point, our issue moves from “why do I keep buying them” to “why do I keep   using them.” Well, there’s a yellow   WHY button for that question. Pressing it lights up a library of information, and we’re called upon to dig into the topics of drug dependence, nicotine addiction, self-medication, dopamine reward cycles, and the grieving process. 
   
  Some wise person once said  : “We fear most what we understand least. Go forth, understand, and fear no more.” That’s what the   WHY button is for  ; hit it.
   
  The next threshold is crossing over from “why I   shouldn‘t smoke“ to “how I   won‘t smoke“. This is when an educated quit becomes a skilled quit. A practiced quit. A   working quit. This is the green   HOW button, and pressing it activates cravebusters and rescue strategies and coping mechanisms  : Sit! Breathe! Relax! Hydrate! Talk! Move! Scream! Chomp! This is when knowing how turns into know-how. 
   
  Okay, light some candles and incense, things are about to get trippy…
   
  Eventually, as you move deeper into a maturing quit, things simmer down into a choice-within-an-epiphany: Quitting isn’t about getting rid of cigarettes at all, it’s about getting rid of that part of us that wants them. It’s that raw moment when we take a hard look in the mirror, without disguises or excuses. It’s honest. “Was I clinging to smoking, or was I escaping from something…else? Do I not deserve to influence my own destiny? When I removed cigarettes from my life, what did I make room for? Who am I meant to be now, without smoking? Deeper yet, who was I meant to be all along, had I never smoked at all?” This is the silver   CHOOSE button, and pressing it means we willingly acknowledge our troubled past and forsake its backwards pull on us. Pressing it means we embrace   only the forward-thinking half of ourselves that now   knows better,   wants better,   needs better…and   does better.
   
  Whoa.
   
  I’m speaking, of course, of my own journey. The progression I’ve described here (  don’t buy them - don’t need them - don’t want them) was true for me. Naturally, I can’t say what your path is gonna look like, but I can say that you mustn’t try to skip ahead to experience someplace you‘ve not reached yet. Live in the moment given to you today, press the appropriate button that gets you through it, and accept that you’re not supposed to be the same person once you reach the other side.
   
   
   STORM
   
   (By the way, there is also a black button that says EJECT. Press it, and you’ll be thrown all the way back to Day 1. You really, really, really don’t ever wanna push it. Doing so is a choice, but it must never be an option.)
13 Comments