Self-talk is so powerful. It really is. And, it…truly…works!
In moments of agitation, our power mantras (“I don’t do that anymore”, “Smoking is not an option”, “Not one puff, ever”, etc.) do possess real strength, and have saved countless quits (I used them, myself, so I know). In addition to those treasures, I also encourage you to create full conversations with yourself. Sentences and detailed paragraphs! Lists of thoughts, linked together in a dialogue!
Because some of us - especially me - benefit most from a thought-out conversation about our quit moments. If that’s true of you, too, then consider these exercises…
* Talk to yourself about why you quit, just to hear yourself express what you want from your life, after cigarettes. Then, get “eye-to-eye” with yourself and firmly state what you must do to keep winning.
* Say, out loud, the facts you know about addiction. This is a good way to list what you have learned, and to discover all the gaps you need to fill in, with research.
* Jump - headlong! - into your next crave, and openly itemize each thing you’re feeling, as it happens. Report it, aloud, as if a medical researcher is in the room to write it all down, for the record.
* In moments of crisis, “ role play” by stepping outside yourself to speak to yourself, as an Elder would, in person. Firmly state, to yourself, what you know an Elder would say to you. This is a way to get the hard truth out of your mouth in moments when you‘re too frenzied to trust what you‘re feeling.
Craves can be worked over, and then worked through, in many ways. The above techniques are what I would suggest any newcomer get familiar with.
Now, may I share some specific experiences from my own quit?
Practice self-talk in your calmest moments: Once, I pretended that my quit buddy called me on The Panic Line, and I openly “talked him out of his crisis“ (seriously, I carried out a make-believe phone call!). I wanted to practice articulating what I‘d need to say, just in case I‘d ever have to answer that call for real. And, you know what? By taking the time to link together the pieces of that “conversation”, in a strength-building chain, I was actually arranging those facts and feelings in my mind, for my own benefit. How cool is that?!
Use self-talk in the heat of unrest and unease: In the early days of my quit, when feeling pangs and urges, I’d shove aside the sliding glass door, march out onto the grass, and I’d growl, “Ain’t gonna happen! Whatever you‘re trying to do, I can beat! However long this takes, I got the time…plus some! You want 3 minutes? Well, I‘ve got all day!” I’d even waggle my fist in the air (melodramatic effect!), and I’d stay out there on the lawn, standing my ground, until I was right. I didn’t care if anyone heard me or saw me. My new quit was worth any measure, and shadowboxing and trash-talking to thin air proved to be a muscular weapon against severe craves. No regrets here!
Finally, before you fall asleep at the keyboard, here’s some extra brain-food for thought…
Long ago, one of my tough-as-nails Mentors (no longer active on the website) told me that Nicodemon is so wickedly insidious because it knows all our weaknesses, and then it has the gall to lie to us in our own voice! That is why it seems so seductive…because “it” is us! "It" knows us! And, when "it" begs, "it" sounds exactly like us!
MIND = BLOWN!!!!
But, wait a minute now….if you really think about it, then isn’t the opposite true? If Nicodemon is really only us, and if Nicodemon wants to talk us into smoking, then logic says we also have an equal power to speak out against ourselves, to oppose each old falsehood with a new truth, and to talk our way out of smoking.
MIND = BLOWN x 2!!!!
Can we not speak our truth to ourselves, in our own voices, and have it carry enough life-saving belief to rescue us in a crisis?
I think so.
I…know…so!
STORM: 837
