Last weekend, I got a text from Fannie’s daughter telling me that they made it through a month. She said they are just trying to figure out their lives now. She is struggling as they all are but she is taking it one day at a time. We have been texting back and forth at least once a week, she is so happy to have someone in her life who was in her mother’s life, even though she did not know. I finally asked her exactly what happened and she told me that they did not do an autopsy but she suspects, as I do, that the dosages of steroids she was taking along with the oxygen deprivation from her severe asthma, stopped her heart. Her family found her on the couch, she was dead at the time. I cannot imagine living with that image in my mind, in fact, I can’t get it out of my mind.
She got a tattoo on her forearm that is in the shape of a heart, the heart says “I love you to the moon and back” which is something Fannie used to say to her. At the beginning of the writing is an iris which was Fannie’s favorite flower. I told her that Fannie would no doubt have some smart remark to say about it and she wrote back and said that made her laugh out loud because she has gotten small tattoos for all of her close family members who have died and Fannie told her that her body was going to look like a graveyard. She thanked me for reminding her that Fannie would, indeed, have made some smart remark. She sent me a picture of the tattoo and, as tattoos go, it really is lovely. She said she could not wait to show me. I felt and feel honored.
Today, I got another text, we are on a Sunday schedule and she is going to start seeing a therapist this week, she is also going to start yoga to see if she can find different outlets for her emotions. She wanted me to pass on the family’s thanks for all of the cards she has gotten from the members of EX, it has meant a great deal to them. They love knowing Fannie was so supported and loved. Thank you everyone for remembering our dear friend who left way too soon.
Love,
Ellen
