I want to thank everyone in response to my blog yesterday. Everyone has shared and have been so supportive. Understanding.
My mom always had a saying, "I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy", I wouldn't wish this on anyone.
It isnt fair, but we all have to go through it. It is not a tragedy when an old person dies, I heard that somewhere, I know it is true, but she was my old person, so it is a tragedy in my life. I will get past it and already it is as if nothing as happened for most people.
I understand that everyone has to get on with their life, time doesn't stand still, even it did for me for awhile, and I don't hold it against them, because I too have gotten on with my life when others were grieving from the death of a loved one, it is what we do.
I lost it last night though, I got really upset. I was even yelling, I was told that my niece went and had her done, she knew my mom, had lived with my mom from birth with my sister, her mom, I just felt like it was not showing respect, did it have to be the same day, couldn't it have waited a few days, it made nuts, maybe I was wrong, I don't feel I was though, I felt my mom deserved at least one day from my niece. I guess my niece didn't feel that way. Can not make her.
I still dont feel like talking to anyone, I don't want to go over it again and I don't have anything pleasant to say. I suppose in a few days, I am just tired of it all.
Oh, well, we all have our burden, thank you for letting me vent, when my husband died and my sister, I couldn't do it, with my husband I couldn't write and I had no one to speak of it with after a few weeks no one really wants to hear about it anymore, and with my sister, I just didn't want to, I think repressed her death more, my husbands was worse, I think I was a little crazy in the beginning, this one I feel more in control, more sane. I guess it is true about the more you go through the stronger you get.
Thanks my lovely ex. family
