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Share your quitting journey

Addictions. We all have them

JonesCarpeDiem
0 6 9

If they control us and how they control us is what I'd like to discuss.
There is a built in evolutionary need to want to feel good. We can't really change that, it's what we've inherited.
Addictions cause a dopamine release. That's what makes us feel good.

Some people stay busy all the time. Accomplishing things triggers their dopamine release. Some people create. For some it's the love of being in nature. For others music, art, cooking, photography or some other means. A jogger runs to get their dopamine. Sports and exercise are considered healthy addictionsbut I have known people who could only focus on getting to the beach and surfing. It's really a matter of how much you allow it to control your daily life.
 

Now let's consider the unhealthy addictions and how they make like minded addicts flock together for acceptance and validation. This is true of any drug.
I've always said that if you want to break a drug addiction, you have to stop hanging out with the people who share the same addiction. I know that some of you are living with smokers and that can be difficult as you are constantly reminded of doing it. It can stay in the forefront balanced on the fulcrum of "should I or shouldn't I?". If you distance yourself from it, it is easier to let it go. You can distance it mentally with some of the techniques we teach here, even if you live with a smoker.
 

Besides the health problems we know smoking creates, it most certainly puts limitations on who you interact with in all areas of your life.
Can they smell you coming as you enter the job interview?
Are you unable to concentrate 30 minutes into that contract negotiation?
Do they really want you to hold their baby?
How about the smoker box when you fill out that dating questionnaire?

The only way to quit smoking is to disengage from it and distance yourself from fixating on it.

IMPORTANT: With our evolutionary need to get dopamine and feel good, it is imperative that you find addictions that replace the nicotine based infrastructure with something different and positive so you don't go back to smoking.

As Peggy says:
Smokers don't get to smoke. They have to smoke.
If you have no tools in your arsenal to quit smoking and stay quit, ask us.

6 Comments
About the Author
Hello, My name is Dale. I was quit 18 months before joining this site and had participated on another site during that time. I learned a lot there and brought it with me. I joined this site the first week of August 2008. I didn't pressure myself to quit. HOW I QUIT I didn't count, I didn't deny myself to get started. When I considered quitting (at a friends request to influence his brother to quit), I simply told myself to wait a little longer. No denial, nothing painful. After 4 weeks I was down to 5 cigarettes from a pack a day. The strength came from proving to myself, I didn't need to smoke because I normally would have smoked. Simple yes? I bought the patch. I forgot to put one on on the 4th day. I needed it the next day but the following week I forgot two days in a row I put one in my wallet with a promise to myself that I would slap it on and wait an hour rather than smoke. It rode in my wallet my first year.There's nothing keeping any of you from doing this. It doesn't cost a dime. This is about unlearning something you've done for a long time. The nicotine isn't the hard part. Disconnecting from the psychological pull, the memories and connected emotions is. :-) Time is the healer.